27... and miles to go...

I was born 27 years ago today.

My childhood pal's grandma, living in the house opposite to mine, died today :(.

Birth and death. Like two sides of a coin.

It's a li'l scary. Not the aging part. I mean the "What have you done so far worthwhile in your life" part.

The grandma lived to a ripe old age and every one paid her their respects today. She was well-loved by all.

What have I done in my life - so far - to warrant such a respect, if I were to - god forbid - die today?

Let's see, in the past 27 years I managed to -

1. Get admitted in one of the best colleges in India, flunk repeatedly and finally manage to pass out of architecture college

2. Find out that I can write. I CAN WRITE! I AM NOT WORTHLESS!

3. Get infatuated in and out of then-divine and now-blah dudes (both on-screen and real life). Learn that all that's white is not fevicol (lol)

4. Win a writers' fellowship from a US magazine and visit the great country... come back to motherland, write a series of eight picture books and start tasting success as a writer

5. Become closer to parents in one year and persuade them to let go of me

6. Go back to US again as a trainee in the same magazine that gave me the fellowship

7. Manage to find one true love - New York. Fall utterly and madly in love with the place. Wish to be buried there.

8. Like all true love stories, break up with New York (visa expiration) and return to motherland. Get commissioned to write 40 picture books on Mahabharatha and complete it exactly a year later (avg. = one book in 10 days)

9. Become a freelance columnist for some cool glossies in South India and snag a job as a Copy Lead in Officetiger

10. Been a good friend and confidante to some great friends like Sudha who remember my birthday and send me gift certificate when I least expected it (talk about pleasant shocks!)

So. I guess I have not done bad. But still... there are so many things I want to do. I want to take workshops for writers. I want to start a career counselling center for students. I want to visit a country a year. I want to go to New York and listen to that Tibetan music at Times Square. I want to start my own magazine soon.

Miles to go. And the average goal rate ain't so good.

But I'll try. That's all we can do, right?

WELL, Back I am

Less than 10 months ago, I came to US, possibly looking to make a life here. I did have a great time. The experience and insight I had gathered, the lessons and new things I had learned, the friendship and memories I had made... It was wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world!

Yet I am back in India.

The reasons are many. I couldn't bear the cold, I was tired of getting sick all the time, I was lonely, I wanted to have Indian food three times a day, I missed my cat, I missed writing, I din't want to exist as one among the million NRIs in the US...

Somehow, the wish to be a NRI got replaced by a wish to be SOMEONE.

So many reasons... and the main one - I realised that the children's publishing industry is saturated in the US, and I would have to start from scratch... whereas, in India I can be a pioneer in the field... and I got a huge opportunity to be that, to be a writing partner of a creative agency...

Not to mention that the week after I landed in India, I found out - painfully, of course - that I had kidney stones. I shudder to think of the expense and the agony I'd have faced and the nuisance I'd have caused if it had happened when I was in US...

God works in mysterious ways, don't you think?

N for NYC

The Big Apple is where I hang out these days.

Of course, I love my little pastoral town – with its rolling meadows and deep woods - but NY is something else – vibrant, maddening, pulsating. There’s simply no comparison at all, it’s like asking which do you like – chocolate mousse or chicken korma!

I made interesting discoveries while here –

-- You can see black (African-American), yellow (Chinee) and brown (Latin and Indian) faces here, more than white faces

-- The subway is not a dangerous place, unless you want to dance on the tracks. I always managed to get lost and always a kind stranger rescued me and put me on the right train

-- When you're in Times Square, you can always see a maami (a dowager aunt in India) in a sari, usually between the ages 40-80

-- Contrary to popular belief, the streets of America are not rife with smooching couples. I’m yet to see a couple kissing or hugging in public.

-- If you're lost, never, EVER ask directions to an African-American (esp. girls), a Mexican or a Indian. Because... the first one will deliberately show you the opposite direction, the second will spend 5 minutes telling you that he doesn't know and the third one will ask your entire biography before he helps you out with the right address.

That's it for now :)

My Top 20 in life...

... that’s guaranteed to bring a smile in your face!

20. An almost-empty bus (or one that arrives at the bus stop as soon as you do!)

19. Teasing the bride with the groom on the marriage hall

18. Finding a 100-rupee note - or a 20$ bill! - in your desk, just when you’re really, really broke

17. Watching a great movie with NO babies crying, NO fathead sitting before you and absolutely NO distractions whatsoever

16. Funny dreams that linger for a long time after you’ve woken up

15. A meal of crab soup, mutton biriyani and lichee ice cream with hot gulab jamun (yumm)

14. A nice, intelligent conversation with a guy who doesn't think he's God's gift to women

13. Walking uphill in Kodaikkanal roads in the early morning

12. Getting a surprise gift on your birthday (wow!)

11. Planning a surprise gift and giving it when it’s least expected (double wow!)

10. Laughing for a silly joke so hard your face hurts

9. Dressing up for a special occasion (or for a special person!)

8. Runner’s high, collapsing under the fan after a hard run

7. Brunch, movie, gossip and shopping with your best friend

6. Playing with a puppy and feeding it from your hand

5. Writing all night and reaching the wretched deadline just in time

4. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you

3. Reading a terrific book in bed, listening to the rain outside

2. Having a child snuggle close to you and tell a secret

1. Just being in the same room with someone you love :)

Finally found a place

Can you believe this?!

I come to a proper american village in USA, 3 hours from the nearest city, where I expected to be the only dark-skinned person in town... and I learn that there's going to another!

Yep, another Indian + unmarried + woman - same as me - has joined the company!

Now that I have a room mate, I can finally afford to look for an apartment. My roomie, AB, is a very chic and friendly person who, I am relieved to say, is not at all snobbish or haughty (sadly, most of the Indian women I meet in the US are). She readily agreed to house-hunt with me, and we have okay'ed on a upper floor apt of a Victorian house in Brown Street.

The apt has 2 bedrooms, a big kitchen, a small-ish living room, and a full attic space (equivalent to the apt floor)... the flat is around 15 min walk to the office, but AB has a car, so I won't have much problem... the rent is US$500 per month, that comes to US$300 per head, incl. utilities...not bad at all, I'd say.
Thanks again, Marileta, for letting me crash your place for MORE THAN 2 MONTHS!

Once again, I am just stunned. A well-paying internship in the most developed country in the world, wonderful co-workers who can't do enough for me, and a friendly Indian roomie with a car... Am I being watched over an angel or what?

The Astrological Case Study of Yours Truly

Shoot me, but I caved in and actually ordered a online paid report about my "astro" personality. It cost me a mere ten dollars, which is my sole justification... And I hate to tell this... most of the readings were surprisingly accurate – which just pisses me off.

Oh well. There’s a lot of unexplained things in the world, let this be one more in the line!

Here’s my birth chart dissected for both entertainment and scientific purposes –

Ascedant: Libra
Sun: Taurus
Moon: Libra
Mercury: Aries
Venus: Gemini
Mars: Leo
Jupiter: Virgo
Saturn: Virgo

*

Ascendant is the face you show to the world; how others see you
ASCENDANT IN LIBRA

- A great healer and counselor
tell me about it, sigh.

- Struggles to find balance in own life
don’t know about that. When I make up my mind, I usually stick to it.

- Aesthetically inclined; loves beauty
I guess, yeah.

*

Sun rules your outer personality
SUN IN TAURUS

- Stubborn
yep

- Sensual
er, I guess

- Slow to anger; extremely dangerous when angered
Hmm, could be. Just ask my parents, grin.

- Very oriented toward the material world
Really? I wouldn’t know, since I am always broke.

- Practical, stodgy and resists changes
WRONG! I love love LOVE changes, my favorite pastime is building castles in the air and I hate stodginess in any form.

*

Moon rules emotional part of your character
MOON IN LIBRA
- Born peacemaker; will do anything to maintain peace
- Will go to pieces during a dispute
- Wants to be loved by everyone

Yes. Yes. Dammit, YES!

*

Mercury is responsible for your style of Communication
MERCURY IN ARIES
- Impulsive and hot-headed.
- Over the top enthusiast
- Speaks without thinking

I totally agree to all the above, grrrr.

*

Venus is how you attract - the planet of Love
VENUS IN GEMINI

- Love of words; loves to travel
YES!

- Multiple affairs of the heart; loves to love two at a time
What? WHAT?

- Flirty, flighty and promiscuous
What the FUCK, grrrrrr….

- More than one profession indicated
okay, phew. That’s true enough.

- Loves freedom and is independent to the core
er, true too.

*

Mars is how you go after things - the planet of Action
MARS IN LEO
- Daring and courageous; doesn’t accept defeat easily
Exactly. Heh heh.

- Will woo in grand style
oh yeah, baby….

- Can be bossy and arrogant
Mayyyyy be….

- Loves to show off
Huh? Who, me? No way!

- The sign Mars occupies in a woman’s natal chart implies the kind of men she will be attracted to. Your Mars is in Leo so, given a chance, you’ll be all over the Leo cats
This is so, SO creepily true I’m not even going to talk about it, grrrr.

(Apparently, the sign Venus in a man’s birth chart will imply the kind of women he falls for!)

*

Jupiter is the planet of career
JUPITER IN VIRGO

- Blessed with perfection for detail
huh? Dude, that is so NOT true!

- Works best in a group
yeah, but I also work well by myself.

- Destined for practical service in a worthwhile cause
Absolutely. One day I dream of working for the UN. (Yes, really.)

*

Saturn rules the principle of limitation.
SATURN IN VIRGO

- When Saturn is in a sun sign, it tampers with the exact qualities that sign are known for. Virgo is the sign renown for great attention and fanatic detailing. When Saturn is in Virgo, slackness and aimlessness is a result.
Oh. So that’s why I’m such a OB?

- Must learn discipline and avoid distractions.
Hmm. Whatever.

- The person has difficulty distinguishing what is important from what is not. Therefore the native must work extra hard to clarify ill defined circumstances and chaotic situations. At times this may seem overwhelming. As a result, there can be mental worry, hypochondria, and depression.
Noted. Will try to worry less from now on – by OBing more, heh heh.

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Finally, here are the five most important things that, according to this report, have defined my current personality –

Sun in Taurus, Moon in Libra
"The combination of your Sun sign and your Moon sign produces one of the most likable personalities in the Zodiac wheel. Others may have more wit, ambition, or intellect, but none equal the charm and appeal of this combination. This personality is marked with optimism, even if up to your ears in private woes. Anyone that doesn't like you is probably motivated by jealousy."

A nice home and a close family are your first loves; social contact and involvement, a close second. You may have a wide range of emotional responses from rapturous joy when you are happily with a special someone in a solid relationship, to almost going to pieces when you are confronted by hostility and forced to react to it. But your great sense of balance and harmony constantly protects you from ever go off the deep end.

Heh heh. Thanks for the compliments!

Sun in Taurus, Venus in Gemini
“In Gemini, Venus generates a need for a variety of experiences. You want to taste all that life has to offer. You have an excitable child-like attitude toward romance, approaching affairs of the heart with light-headed optimism and high-expectations. Change and excitement is the spice of your love life, and a partner that doesn't understand this won't be around long.

With Venus in Gemini, you are easily bored and if you marry too young or to someone who is possessive, you may have serious problems. Luckily, your sun is in the most emotionally stable sign of Taurus. This is mutually beneficial, since Taurus will temper the flightiness of the Gemini Venus and in turn, your Venus will lighten up the stodgy nature of your Taurus sun sign.”

Phew, sigh. For a minute I thought I was a goner.

Sun in Taurus, Mars in Leo
“The persevering stability of Taurus and the enthusiastic optimism of Leo join hands to create one of the most success-driven planetary positions in a birth chart. With the Sun in Taurus and Mars in Leo, you are one determined and volatile person who will never stop at obstacles but will just keep going and going till you reach your goal. This combination is usually found in the birth chart of leaders, pioneers and unfortunately, dictators. Make sure you don’t invite bossiness, bullheadedness and over-confidence in your nature.”

Oh, stop it! Enough with the praises, don't make me blush!


Influence of Venus and Mars
Since Venus is very strong in your chart, your Gemini traits will tend to dominate your decisions and all your life, you must battle between the flighty Venus side and the sensible Taurus side of your psyche.

Sigh. That's true enough, I guess.

Your frivolous and flighty exterior hides an ambitious nature. You would probably end up with a man who is an aggressive but fickle charmer and moves in influential circles. You would then become his muse and in time the devoted mother of his children.

Huh?


Influence of Sun and Moon
You have your sun in Taurus, moon in Libra and ascendant in Libra. Venus is the Planet of Love that rules both Taurus and Libra. As a Venus native, you just can’t help being in love. Your sun, moon and ascendant are all under the control of Venus, which means that your whole world revolves around the word LOVE.

Drat.

Without something or somebody to love, your life will feel incomplete. You wouldn't know how to live alone, because you cannot live without somebody to love in your life. With the triple influence of Venus in your birth chart, you understand what a man's wants, and know exactly how to give it to him!

Alright, that’s it, now SHUT UP!

I'm a WHAT?

People always wonder why I chose to do an internship when I am already a published author. Back in India I’ve given writing workshops, sat on editorial meetings with publishers and single-handedly edited book length manuscripts, BUT… I have never known where the bottom rung of the ladder was.

You see, I’ve never been an intern, an editorial assistant, a junior editor… which is how I should have progressed. I got directly appointed as the in-staff manuscript writer and editor, just because I happened to be at the right place, at the right time with the right credentials. It’s probably my good karma, but still, it had always made me uneasy. Very uneasy.

I probably sound stupid, but I feel the best way to the top is by climbing from the bottom … any other way you don’t know when its all gonna vanish. Poof!

That’s why I applied for the trainee position at this magazine, 'cos –

- one, they are teaching me the basics, which I had always missed knowing about;

- two, I’m going to live in the US (yay!)

- and three, frankly, I’d have even accepted a job in Mars to get away from my match-making mother!

....And yeah, there's a very important fourth reason which shall remain in deadly secrecy for all eternity (till I publish it online someday when its safe to do so :)

All considered, I think it’s a pretty good bargain!

You're a WHAT?

That's what people say when I tell them that I'm an architect.

Yeah, yeah. I AM a qualified architect. Honest to God, I am. But I’m now write children’s books. Go figure.

As the saying goes, the whole thing was an accident. Only in my case, it was a horrifying, mind-numbing, and soul-bending accident.

Okay I am only half-kidding. It wasn’t that terrible… but, yeah, it was a nightmare.

I wanted to be a journalist and join Discovery Channel. Ok, may be that sounds really childish, but when you’re 17 and love animals, you could see that it had a certain appeal. But ah, reality.

My parents were appalled at my “ambition”. Like any other sensible folks, they wanted me to be a computer engineer.

So I chose to study architecture - an utterly-immature, twisted choice that said “If you’re not approving my dream, I’m not going to approve yours either”.

Boy, did that prove to be the ugliest decision in my life…

As far as I can remember, college was a series of frustrated idleness, sudden bursts of rewarding creativity and long, mind-numbing periods of OBing. With no talent as an artist and minimal social skills, I was fated to be a failure. I bunked, flunked, slept through the lectures, the exams and the whole damn years – in short, I totally, totally wasted an expensive, good education, grrrr….

May be I could have survived if I didn’t have to compete with some of the best brains in the state… but that was not to be the case. I think some of the lecturers in my college are still heaving in relief that I finally left the college…

Welll… I guess I couldn’t say that it was not all a total waste… during my training period, I made the discovery that I liked to write, which paved the way to my current profession… and I had formed some surprise friendships that have lasted till this moment…

Probably the only regret I have about the whole thing - the waste of a perfectly good and rare college seat in one of the top universities in India. If some really deserving person had got admission instead of me, s/he would have been much, much happier…

As such, it’s always fun to watch people’s eyes pop out when I say that I don't practise architecture, even though I did graduate. I always get lectured during family get-togethers and functions that why, oh why, do I have to waste an architecture degree for - huh, gasp, eek! – writing stories… and why can I practice design during the day and write during the night?

Yeah, right, and I’m a friggin’ Super Woman, grrrr.

Biggest Apple in the World

I was in the city last week. I mean, I was in THE city. The Big Apple.

I was all prepared to hate it. I mean, I did hate it when I was there before. Last year, I had a harried tourist's view of it - and I hate to have a harried view of anything. I enjoy discovering new things everytime I go to the Walmart in my town, so naturally, I didn't like finding myself rushed from one place to another in New York.

My hosts were very sweet, I should say - school pal Vidya and her hubby Aravind transported me from Boston to NY in their own car and took me around, touring the major attractions in the weekend. But still, I was disconcerted, cheated as if I had been served a badly cooked meal. So I went back to India feeling disillusioned.

But this time, it was different. I had time. I had a week in fact. And I was alone. Yayyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!

I stayed as a house-guest at 72nd Street. My writer-pal Shelley had very kindly invited me to share her gorgeous Manhattan Apartment and it was a week I'd never forget in my life. It's really surprising how different, how utterly refreshing things are when you are prepared to look at them in leisure.

Central Park didn't feature in our schedule last time. I spent every afternoon there last month.

Times Square left me cold last year. This year, I could barely stand still - the very air smelled thrilling.

And SAJA 2005 in Columbia University was pure manna. I finally felt like I belonged somewhere.

New York is like slow poison. By the time it was sunday, the day I had to leave, I felt sick - physically sick. But like all good things in the world, I knew I had to go - and I knew I always could come back.

Would come back.

First drafts

At first glance, I admit, I do look like your basic brittle and screwed-up NRI woman you see scattered in the metros of the US. But I don't live in the city (ah, NY!). I don't even live in the suburbs. I'm not on H1B, I'm not in debt and I'm not even safely married to a silicon-valley resident.

What I am is on the wrong side of 25, right side of a writing career and the greatest procrastinator in the world.

I live in a beautiful little town in Pennsylvania. It has exactly 3 streets, one little park and about a million lush, green woods. I'm here for an year-long training in the editorial offices of a children's magazine and each day I wake up, not entirely believing that I'm here, in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

I'm writing this blog solely to keep tab on my progress in the next 12 months - which I'm hoping I would. Like any great procrastinator, I have a very poor memory - or rather the great ability to block out certain memories... if allowed, I'll happily spend my remaining time in blissful rut and never learn a thing outside my training.

And along the way, my O.B.l.o.g will also try to - if I actually write something - tabulate the woeful struggles faced by yours truly in trying to finish the great Indian novel.

Alright, put on your seat belt. And stay tuned. Yawn.

Today was my first day at work.

I am the new editorial intern at Highlights for Children, world's most-circulated children's magazine @ two million subscribers. My workplace is located in a beautiful place called Honesdale, in Pennsylvania. I have been here before - it was last year, when I won the fellowship and stayed here for a couple of days - and I am falling in love with the place again.

It was a little strange in the beginning, but I quickly understood about the duties... mostly administrative work, but also attending meetings with editors and doing research work for them.

I love my desk... and my own computer. Andy and George are in the same room as I, and Joelle and Judy in the next room. Everyone is being so helpful and kind... I think I have been blessed by God to have such nice people as my colleagues!

So here I am... in the US Of A!

I am inssssssssssssanely excited... to put it mildly. when I landed, I felt like kissing the floor of the airport. I swear, even the AIR here feels different.... oh wait, I know what it is... it smells of freeso, new opportunities and new horizons!

I am, of course, a little scared of the internship... will I pass muster? I do feel a tad overqualified for the gig... but I'm here for the experience, so I am happy!

Will I go back? As of now, I really don't know. I have a full year to make that decision.