Writer in Transit

RACC - Week 1

2010-03-06T14:08:00.000-05:00

Today was the first class of WRITE A NOVEL IN A MONTH course at Richmond Adult Community College (RACC). When I was doing a routine search at Floodlight, I came across this course and promptly enrolled, as the course was quite inexpensive and Richmond was only a short bus ride away from Ealing.

RACC is a nice little campus in central Richmond, a couple of minutes walk from the tube/rail station, and located directly opposite to Twickenham stadium.

The course facilitator is Susan Lynes, a novelist and a successful NaNoWriMo achiever. She was a very gentle, very sweet person who knew what she was talking about. There were about 12 students. All except one were women; he was a graphic artist who had enrolled along with his mother.

The first class went fairly well. Susie gave us an intro on the NaNoWriMo method, and debunked some myths about speedwriting. She was very encouraging, and dynamic in a quiet, unobtrusive way. As always I become happy being a part of learners, listening to the voice of wisdom.

I am glad I joined this course, even though I have serious doubts about writing novels. My quick-fix mind veers towards short stories, which, any seasoned writer would tell you this, has no "money". But what to do - the heart wants what it wants :)

Course Link - http://www.racc.ac.uk/course/L00101-101104

Anger management

2010-02-28T12:46:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, a group of young teens threw french fries at me when I was having lunch. I had shopped for some cheap boots - how stupid to buy them during the fag end of winter season - shopping always makes me hungry. I was sitting alone in a corner in a generic KFC, reading and munching on a burger, when I felt these soft thingies hitting my neck and hip.

Two years back, I'd have either confronted them or complained to the floor manager. But in this north London neighbourhood or Holloway Road, I was not able to get angry at these kids (who, by the way, all were at least 5 inches taller than me, and i'm 5'5"). Instead, I could only muster forgiving thoughts. They were clearly looking for trouble, and I wasn't going to give that to them. God knows how much trouble they have already faced in their lives.

I have finally understood that not everyone can be as privileged as I am, and that I should not feel guilty about it. Instead of feeling angry or trying to fix the problem, I have learnt to just let it be and move on.

Changes

2010-02-23T12:37:00.001-05:00

I critiqued a piece today. It was just a couple of 100 words, but the relief it brought me was enormous. I felt good. That is what is different about me now. I am able to FEEL more. Yes, I am doing less, writing less than EVER, but inside, I feel like I am expanding in a different direction. Moving, growing, spreading myself.

Living and travelling in UK has its ups and downs. More ups than downs, IMO, though others would beg to differ (their most powerful argument being that I am wasting my peak years doing nothing related to my career, which was kind of in super speed until I decided to resign and run to UK).

While that's technically true, I don't think it's that bad. By putting myself out of my comfort zone, I have learnt many lessons. I have almost lost in touch with the world I knew and the work that I was familiar with. I do not write for a living any more. I do not see familiar faces from my country. I do not speak my mother tongue, I do not do what I used to be good at.

Instead I am learning stuff. I now have a new vocation, one I am learning every day. I have new dreams, new insights, new wisdom. I am not as arrogant or confident as before. While I still have personal and professional issues, I feel like a different person. I think, from time to time, you need to shed your old skin and feel fresh and new. It gives new meaning to your life, and spurs you enjoy every second of it.

Kaput

2010-02-18T12:34:00.000-05:00

So I failed on the fifth day, when I had to go back to reality and do my normal chores. Temptation was too much to resist!

Dr. Joshi's Detox - Day 4

2010-02-17T20:59:00.003-05:00

It was almost a perfect day.

I woke up with no appetite. Just had a handful of Food Doctor's Seed mix.

Lunch was a bowl of steamed french beans and sweetcorn. I seasoned it with a few drops of olive oil, rock salt, pepper and lemon juice.

I then went to the National Portrait Gallery with my friend. Wlaked around quite a bit, adding exercise to art appreciation.

Evening snack was a bowl of boiled chickpeas. Dinner was my trademark curried one-egg omelette with spinach and ginger.

Dessert? An ice cream bowl of cut banana mixed with yogurt, and flavoured with honey and cinnamon. I also added walnuts and some slivered almonds.

You would think that such a good day would have a good ending.

It did not. Because I just finished a mini tube of Smarties.

Caved in on the 4th day of the detox. Of course, I bitterly regret it now, but I learned a good lesson. As I bit into the first Smartie, my mouth was filled with a bitter, metallic taste. I really didn't enjoy those chocolate buttons, because, I think, my body has learned to identify the junk that it actually is.

And now that my tongue has told me how vile the artificial colouring on chocolate is, I will never go near them again. Even as I write this, my mouth is tasting so funny and bitter. I have to brush again!

I had given myself 3 times (out of 3 weeks), to stray from the detox, if it is unavoidable or too overwhelming. The first time had happened today. I will try my best not to let it happen again.

But I do know one thing. The next 2 times, if they happen, will NOT happen because of chocolate. After completing this detox, I may eat them now and then... may be at the movie hall or during a party - but I know I will never be addicted to chocolate again.

So may be it IS a perfect day, after all!

STRAYED? Yes :(. one small hexagonal tube of Nestle Smarties. 172 calores. Sigh.

SURPRISED? - That I could spend a day on so little food.

REPELLED? - Initial taste of chocolate was just plain horrible.

MOOD? - Sheepish and guilty but wise and relieved...

Dr. Joshi's detox - Day 3

2010-02-17T03:00:00.002-05:00

Day 3 went okay, but I had my first craving today. It was not a nice feeling :(

I always breakfast on a curried egg omelette and a tall glass of warm lemon water, so I will not mention it again from the next post... do not want to be a parrot!

I had 3 feta rice cakes as a mid-morning snack and two more as an evening snack. This time I topped it with Food doctor's original seed mix, a savory mix of dry-roasted sunflower, sesame, pumpkin, hem and linseed seeds(this is a must if you are doing the detox, bcos on spoon of this will keep your sugar levels good between the meals and stop any cravings). It was okay, but I will go back to plain linseed topping. Seed mix is great only when munched on its own!

Lunch was a big bowl of roasted carrots and brussels sprouts, with home made hummus dip. There is pretty much no hope for brussels sprouts, but if you slice your carrots really thin (use a grater), add a few drops olive oil+rock salt+pepper and roast them for 30 minutes, they come out as these incredible chips. It is almost like cheating, lol.

Dinner was a small bowl of lentils mixed with brown rice, accompanied by masala salmon. I took one slice of salmon, chopped it, and sauteed it in 1/2 a tsp of olive oil, with a generous sprinkling of garam masala and chilli powder. I find that I am very reluctant to cook for dinner... I have the energy to experiment in the kitchen during the day, but as soon as it becomes 8pm, I start getting sleepy, and by 9pm, I cannot wait go to bed, so I just heat up whatever is in the fridge as have it as dinner. Hmmm, must do something about this... brown rice may be healthy, but I won't be losing much weight if I am eating it everyday!

Dessert was a banana, bcos for some reason, I did not want to have the cinnamon yoghurt. I have been pee'ing a lot during the day, which is tend to happen, I guess, if I drink 2 litres of water. I did wake up in the night today around 2am, but went back to sleep promptly.

Strayed? - NO

Surprised? - Carrot chips was yummy

Repelled? - There is really no way to make brussels sprouts tasty.

Cravings? - Had my first longing for hot chocolate today when I watched an ad on TV (this was during the 8pm-9pm FRIENDS telecast on E4). Then for about 30 seconds, I considered dropping the detox and stuffing myself with chicken biriyani and chocolate fondue. I immediately got up and had a banana, and the feeling reluctantly went away.

Mood? - Calm but a little uneasy

Dr. Joshi's detox - Day 2

2010-02-15T08:35:00.004-05:00

Something incredible – no no, three things incredible have happened and I HAD to blog in the middle of Day 2.

Incredible thing no. 1:
----------------------
I woke up at 7am. I slept at 9pm last night and woke up at 7am today. In case, it doesn't strike as unusual, I am used to waking up AT LEAST 3 times during any night. No, not to go to the loo, but just wake up randomly, look at the ceiling for a few minutes, and then go back to sleep. I was not an insomniac, but I certainly was a disturbed sleeper.

That I went to bed at 9am itself was a surprise, because I have never done that. I usually stay awake till 11pm, and even if I needed to go to bed early, it is always because of an fatigue-filled day or if I HAD to get up early the next morning. So when I slept at 9am and got up at 7am on Detox Day 1, without even waking up once... gosh, I do not know when that happened last. Years and years ago, I am sure!

Incredible thing no. 2
-----------------------
I made myself a one-egg omelette of breakfast. My recipe for omelette is a little detailed. Beat an egg in a bowl, and add a tablespoon of rice milk, along with a pinch of table salt and 2 pinches of Korma curry powder. Put a non-stick tava or flat pan on medium heat. Saute ½ an onion in ½ tsp of olive oil for 3 minutes, add green chilli, ginger and garlic , and saute for two more minutes. Now add ½ a cup of fresh spinach leaves, and saute for three more minutes.

Now, pour the egg into the pan and twirl the pan around to distribute the egg evenly. Sprinkle fresh ground pepper according to your level of tolerance and let the egg set for a minute. Then flip the egg over (doesn't matter if it breaks!), turn off the stove, and remove the pan from stove top. Let the omelette remain in the pan for one more minute, and then transfer it to a plate.

This omelette is incredibly light and tasty, but also incredibly inadequate to be a filling breakfast. But today, instead of half an onion and half cup of spinach, I added one onion and one cup of spinach. After finishing this, I didn't feel like I need another omelette! Aha! So that's the secret. Increase the amount of veggies.

Later, around 11am, I spread some marinated feta on a rice cracker and bit a bit piece. As I started to munch, and felt as if someone kicked into my throat. I started coughing like mad and had to drink some water. Then I returned back to remaining rice cake, and took baby bites. Tiny nibblings, and this time, I didn't cough. God! Was that actually my own body telling me not to wolf down food and savour it slowly??? Phew!!!

Incredible thing no. 3
----------------------
So this is what happened – last night, I weighed myself in the new digital weighing machine. It showed 70.21 kgs!!! Eeeek! Then I remembered – clothes add to the weight (especially if you are living in wintry London and wear three layers!). So I weighed myself in my birthday dress. The scale 69.55 kilos. Bleh.

So today morning, on walking up, I did my business in the loo and my eyes fell on the weighing machine. Again, stripped and got on it. Now I am 69.15.... hmmmm.

So I did my breakfast and usual bits of writing and then it was 1pm... time for lunch. I had to pass the bathroom to go to kitchen... you know what I did not, yeah, weighed myself again. And the machine showed..... 68 kgs!!!!!!

What the heck?? Is this even possible? I have not been eating any junk food for only 2 days, and I have already lost 1.5 kilos??? Either the machine is faulty... or this detox must really be magical!!!

POST-SCRIPT:

Lunch - A bowl of boiled green beans and carrots, with a peppery olive oil spray on them. I also had an incredibly supersweet corn on the cob

Snack - Rice cakes with marinated feta and chopped onion, sprinkled with linseed

Dinner - Salmon with dal and brown rice

Desset - There was a bit of the yogurt+honey+walnut+slivered almonds gop left in the fridge, and I did not want to throw it away (I can never throw away food, I was once jobless in London and almost starved). I added a pinch of cinnamon in the yogurt and wow! what a transformation!!! Instantly, the mess became bearable, even enjoyable. I licked the cup clean :)

Strayed? - NO

Surprised? - A pinch of cinnamon did what a teaspoon of honey didn't

Repelled? - Frozen green beans is definitely not similar to fresh green beans.

Cravings? - None whatsoever

Mood? - Feeling strong and empowered

Dr. Joshi's Detox - Day 1

2010-02-14T14:03:00.007-05:00

The day has begun!

I did a dry run in the past 2 days and most of my craving and fears were spent on those two days, so I was surprisingly calm and tensionless today. Physically, I am not quite okay as I have a racking cough, a runny nose and a lethargic mood, due to sinus problems. I even had a temperature, and not much of an appetitie, which was a blessing in disguise, otherwise I would have never been able to resist my unending hunger for junk food.

So here's Day 1 menu:

On waking up, 7am – 1 tall glass of warm water with a tbsp of squeezed lemon. Supposed to cleanse your liver and stomach, after a night's fasting.

Breakfast , 8:30am – 1 egg omelette, scrambled with onion and spinach. Added a small green chilli and a bit of Korma powder, for flavour. It was yummy, but I SO badly wanted to have another egg omelette I then took a deep breath and started eating a banana, and the craving passed.

In about 10 minutes, I started getting ravenous. I then consumed two thin Kallo rice cakes. Surprisingly, I did not have any cravings after that. I was able to work on my writing quietly, till I went to the kitchen around 12:30pm to start cooking and my gaze fell on Food Doctor's original seed mix. Yummy! Had a couple of tbsp of it, and instantly felt energised.

Lunch (1:30pm) – I cooked! I made ladies finger (okra) fry, brown basmati rice and boiled lentils. I am used to eating mild lentils, so I made the okra spicy. Funny, but I made enough for 3 days!

After cooking I realised something... what Joshi was actually advertising was Indian brahmin cooking! That's not a tough thing at all... I have been missing Indian food so much, I have absolutely NO problem eating mild Indian food for the next 3 weeks!

Evening snack – This is where I usually stuff myself with chocolate bars or cakes. I had been scourging the net for Joshi-friendly recipes and came upon a wonderful site called eCurry.com, which has many detox-friendly recipes. One was called Marinated Feta. As per the recipe, I cut the feta cheese into small blocks, put them in a glass bowl and added 1/4 teaspoons of coriander and turmeric, and one chopped green chilli. I poured one tablespoon of garlic-infused olive oil and one tablespoon of and chilli-infused olive oil. I then sprinkled 1/2 teaspoon each of oregano, thyme and rosemary.

The mix was supposed to be marinated for at least a day, but greedy me couldn't wait and pounced on it at once. When I tossed the mix, the feta blocks broke and the whole thing kind of became gooey. Not a problem, I just spread them on my Kallo rice cake and topped with finely chopped onion. Yum-my!

Dinner (8pm): Since I had rice in the afternoon, I thought I will keep it light and veggie-friendly for dinner. THOUGHT being the past tense. I rally wanted to have curried carrots, peas and sauteed Brussels sprouts, but I did NOT feel like cooking, after spending an hour today afternoon in the kitchen. So I just had another bowlful of lentils and brown rice with the okra fry.

I am not sure if this constitutes "cheating", but I did not consume any forbidden food... in my defence, dinner was a very small bowl and I was full very soon - which is a miracle by itself.

Dessert (9pm): A small cup of live yogurt, with a teaspoon of honey and a teaspoon of walnut pieces+almond slivers. Pretty much bleh, but at least I could keep the sugar cravings aside.

It quarter past 9 now and I am feeling sleepy! Never happened before... am I going to get a good night's sleep? I hope so... I stil hav a blocked nose and phlemy cold, so I am looking forward to a peaceful trip to La-la land...

Strayed? - No... (I think)

Surprised? - Marinated feta on rice crackers... super!

Repelled? - Plain yogurt with honey and apricots does NOT taste nice

Mood? - Upbeat and hopeful

Dr. Joshi's DETOX for 21 days

2010-02-12T08:44:00.000-05:00

I am embarking on a diet from today. Yeah, yeah, I know this must be the millionth time I have said THAT, but I am very positive about this one. It is based on Dr. Nish Joshi's Ayurvedic principles. It is not based on starvation, rather we are encouraged to eat till we feel full... but what we eat is the key here. It is a detox diet, which means that the food is going to be so fresh and homemade and additive-free that the body pushes out the toxins stored inside, in order to welcome the new, healthy sustenance.

We CANNOT eat -
Red meat
Seafood, except oily fish
Dairy produce
Fruits, except bananas
Wheat, gluten and yeast
Alcohol
Nuts
Veggies belonging to the nightshade family, i.e., mushrooms, augergines, tomatoes, cucumbers, potatoes and green/red/yellow peppers
Jams and spreads
Coffee and tea, except herbal
Sugar, chocolate and sweets
Artificially produced flavourings, such as ketchup, vinegar and mustard

I know, what is actually left, jeez!

Actually, plenty. In the next 21 days, I can consume reasonable quantity of:

Goat's cheeses (like feta)
White meat – chicken and turkey
Brown basmati or long grain rice
Live yoghurt (unsweetened)
Dark green leaves and vegetables, except avocado
Eggs, no more than 3 to 4 a week
Fish, especially oily but NOT shellfish, tuna or swordfish
Gluten free/wheat free cereals, rice crackers and breads
Honey
Olive oil
Pulses, lentils, chick peas
Soya and tofu products

I stocked my pantry with the following items (cost me £25 at Waitrose) – Live yogurt, Rice milk, Brown Basmati, Cauliflower, cabbage, broccoli, spinach, carrots, red lentils, salmon (4 big pieces), onions, fresh garlic and ginger, mild green chillies, green tea, walnuts, fresh coriander.

(I already had extra virgin olive oil, lemons, and all herbs and Indian spices at home... this is a staple if you want to do this diet, invest in the Indian spices to make your detox tasty... at the barest minimum, you should have: Ground coriander, cumin seeds, black mustard, red chilli powder, turmeric powder, korma powder, garam masala, rosemary, thyme, oregano)

Wish me luck!

AVATAR

2009-12-16T19:20:00.011-05:00

A knee-jerk reaction review of the non-3d version

I firmly believe that one cannot judge a movie on first viewing. I like to review a movie after watching it a second time, after a week of my first viewing, preferably a month later. So may be I should not write this review an hour after seeing AVATAR. A second viewing shows me things that I might have missed the first time. I like to form my opinion after several days, but but BUT... the initial opinion never changes.

I can watch a movie any number of times, but the first impression is, my dear movie aficionados, ALWAYS the best impression. So here it is, the first impression. You know the feeling when watching a really great movie, that awesome realisation that you are watching a masterpiece, the near-teary feeling in your heart that you will be waching this movie again and again with your kids and grandkids?

Well, I did NOT get that feeling after watching AVATAR.

What I did get was that James Cameron has given the children of today and tomorrow a good damn movie. Seriously. Colourful woods and blue aliens and helicopter fights and oh my, even flying dragon-birds. Classic children’s movie, I tell you. Unfortunately, the theatre was filled with adults, adults who looked uncomfortable during the beginning of the movie, bored in the middle, and quite relieved when it ended.

(I did not watch it in 3D because there was no 3d screen at the hammersmith cineworld, but in any case, I don't think it has anything to do with the real essence of a movie.)

But let’s talk a bit about the story here. Humans discover a distant planet called Pandora which contains a valuable mineral. The planet is also inhabited by really tall and incredibly blue aliens (the N’avi) who resist the invasion. Grace (WEAVER), an environmental scientist, tries to stop the army into harming the aliens. Jake Sully (WORTHINGTON), a disabled veteran is given a body mask that makes him look exactly like the Na’vi. The humans introduce him and Grace into the world of Na’vi to know how they can be tricked into giving up their homeland. Will Jake and Grace succeed?

Technically, the movie is cool. If you are a diehard Cameron fan and if you like epic movie plots with gorgeous landscape, you will love it. I too am speechless at the world Cameron created in the movie (but good special effects doth not make a good make!). If you watch this one with children (not teens, though, they will just snort and leave to watch TWILIGHT in the next hall), you will even shed a tear or two at the hardships faced by the aliens. The special effects is marvellous and sure to get an Oscar nod, the actors have done their jobs properly, and it is really good entertainment. But was it worth all the hype? No. And did we expect more from Cameron. YES.

Given the 10-foot-tall aliens and the breathtaking world of Pandora, I can somewhat accept that Cameron was working on this movie for more than a decade (he must have spent most part of it at the 3g lab), but the screenplay left me puzzled. The plot was unoriginal and tired, especially to a scifi junkie like me. The epic good vs evil war theme and even the background music strongly resembled Narnia, and the chanting aliens and environmental theme kind of made it cheesy.

My biggest gripe is that the movie itself is not telling us anything new. It is just another mindless scifi flick like a PLANET OF APES or THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL or WAR OF THE WORLDS. There is nothing wrong with mindless scifi flicks, by the way. I positively love them. I am actually the-love-them-and-leave-them type when it comes to mindless entertainment. You see it, roll your eyes, whoop at the war scenes, and forget about it. Heck, I got more goosebumps when I was watching TRANSFORMERS!!!

That’s what is unacceptable. After 12 years, is this the best Cameron can give us? Where is the rollercoaster thrill of his ALIENS, the haunting beauty of his TITANIC, The suave sexiness of TRUE LIES, the sheer magic of T2? Why is this so generic and why didn’t this movie have any visible trademark that it was directed by a master expert? Why did I not leave the theatre hall feeling privileged to have seen a Cameron movie (should I have watched it in 3D)? Why, why, WHY, dammit?

Now, if only it was advertised as a children’s movie...!!!

(If you want to read an in-depth review which analyses the technical aspects of the movie, please click HERE)

Penniless in London

2009-08-22T03:50:00.000-04:00

I think I am on the verge of another experiment in my life. One that might make or break me.

I made an important discovery today. My wallet is empty.

My next live-in job starts on Sep 1st and till then, I am broke. Completely, utterly broke. All my money has been spent on job-hunting and surviving, and I am at a position where I can rub shoulders with a discreet Zen beggar.

Pluses: I have a roof over my head, food three times a day, a wifi laptop on loan, a library in walkable distance, and a phone that can take incoming calls.

Minus: No money, not even a penny, in my wallet.

One more week to go till I see cash notes in my life. Can I survive? Is it even possible to claim to enjoy life without money?

As I said, this is going to be a most important week in my life. As I looked into my empty wallet, my whole life flashed before my eye. My passions, my hatreds, my previous jobs, my weaknesses, my strengths my vice, my virtues... almost each of them had involved money, directly or indirectly. Can I remain intact, physically and mentally, for a week without the green notes?

Let's find out.

Back in London

2009-07-15T18:45:00.001-04:00

This time, with my mother. One month of sightseeing and job-hunting.

I don't think I will have much time to update this blog, let alone check mail frequently (I still don't have a laptop). Weekdays for jobhunting and weekends for sightseeing - a hectic schedule that is surely going to be exhauting.

But I am happy I have got some one with me to share London with. VERY Happy.

Trust me, the more the see the world, the less you wish to see it alone.

Leaving Kanpur

2009-07-04T01:14:00.001-04:00

The first ever science fiction writing workshop in India (Jun 15 - Jul 3, 2009) came to an end today, with a nice party on the front-yard of Suchithra Mathur's apartment.

We sang, laughed, drank, ate, and exchanged ambitions, plans and email addresses. Full of hope and contentment, took a final midnight walk in the campus of IIT, Kanpur.

Tomorrow, I leave in the early morning to Delhi, for a shopping weekend. I have a meagre budget of Rs. 2000, but I am sure I can buy a lot in Janpath market.

We reached our hostel and waved at the guys, who are on their way to the men's hostel. It will be a long time before we could all meet again, but for now, we smile and say good night.

I didn't go to class today :(.

2009-07-01T12:23:00.002-04:00

I am unwell. I feel dizzy when I stood up or moved fast, and spent the whole day in bed. Is it the heat or as my friends suggested, is something wrong with my blood pressure? Got to do something about this when I go back to Chennai.

When I had my rest and woke up, I started thinking about my writing. If not for anything, I will forever remember this workshop for making me feel good about myself. I never thought I had it in me to write fiction, yet in the past 2 weeks, I have written three stories and all three were praised (even though only one of them is my personal favorite!). I am almost reluctant to submit them to magazines, because I want to keep them in my documents folder and savour their presence... they are the proof that I have "matured" from writing for children to writing for adults...

Meanwhile, here are some well-reputed magazines that pay good money for good stories:

Narrative magazine - http://narrativemagazine.com/shared/submit.php
Pays $350-$1000

Glimmertrain (reading period starts frm July 1) Standard submission - http://www.glimmertrain.com/writguid1.html
Pays $700

The Antigonish Review (reading period starts frm Sep 1) - http://www.antigonishreview.com/submissions.html
Pays $100

Malahat Review - http://malahatreview.ca/submission_guidelines.html
Pays $40 per page

The Pedestal magazine - http://www.thepedestalmagazine.com/submitguidelines.php
Pays: $.08 per word

More magazines here - http://www.pw.org/literary_magazines?apage=*

Introducing Vandana Singh

2009-06-29T13:24:00.001-04:00

Today, Vandana Singh joined us as the 3rd instructor of the workshop.

Vandana is the "scientist" in the trio of Gurus who have been enlightening us in the past 3 weeks. Despite possessing a Ph.D. in theoretical particle physics and teaching at a small-town college in USA, she writers speculative fiction and has published a number of stories. She is also the author of the Younguncle series of children's books.

Due to an unfortunate accident in the loo, I arrived late for the class. I couldn't take part in the exercise but I really enjoyed the rest of the class. Who knew learning about gravity could be so easy? I wish my teaches back in school were this gentle and patient!

And oh, she had another interesting exercise - we had to take a proven scientific fact and retell it as a mythology story. I had a ball writing this one and my entry "The Monkey's Bargain" was praised as one of the best.

I am happy!

Of Chaats and Children

2009-06-27T02:22:00.001-04:00

Tonight was the chaat party at the PBCEC building at IIT-K. Lots of pani puris and tikki chaats and gulab jamuns. And vanilla ice cream too!

Be it a get-together or a conference, if they are not friends or family, I don't mingle with the crowd. I know - this totally kills the concept of networking, which is crucial to a writer, especially to a broke one. But that's the way I am, and I have tried a lot, but I could never, ever make small talk or inane talk or intelligent talk. I have just come to terms with it and stopped agonising about it.

But this party at IIT-K was a slight exception. My classmates were such an outrageous lot (think ADHD kids on drugs) that it was impossible to hide from them. So while I successfully avoided mingling with the faculty (not by choice; there is something about me that makes members of academia run for cover), I spent quite some time "chaating" with Himanshu and Akshat.

After an hour, it became apparent that 8pm is the limit for IIT parties, which elicited collective groans from the aforementioned hyper classmates. Just when we were about to leave, Himashu noticed a chubby boy, around 9, sitting alone in a corner of the lawn. I had noticed him earler, and Himanshu succeeded in what I wanted to do - he steered out little group towards the boy and sat near him.

Like a typical IIT kid, he was relaxed and quietly confident. He answered our questions patiently and commented casually about the heat. He had a very adult-like way of nodding his head when speaking, and I felt the familiar rush of compassion and delight that I feel these days for kids. I wanted to hug him and sit with him and play a game of chess, take him to the zoo this weekend, and may be exchange email ids and years down the lane, advice him which country to go during his gap year.

It is during times like these that I remember my age - very, very close to the big 3-oh. The clock is loudest when I see children sitting alone or being quietly brave. I never simper over babies - in fact, being the OB I am, I don't even like being responsible enough to care for babies - but older children always make me sad. In a hearbeat, they turn the corner to find Teensville and acquire precocious (even cynical) wisdom, but when they are still at middle school and believe in Famous Five, they are innocense personified, a rare feat and sight in the world.

Science Fiction workshop 2009, IIT Kanpur

2009-06-16T10:21:00.000-04:00

So far, great.

The 1st batch is a mixture of late teens, young people, and above 30 category. We had a journalist, a lecturer, a copy editor, a moleculor biologist, few IIT students, and a newspaper columnist amidst us.

The mornings (9am-1pm) are spent in critiquing each other's stories, and the afternoons (2:30pm-5:30pm) in theory and writing exercises. This is EXACTLY what I wished I had as a college experience when I was younger. Anil Menon is an awesome workshop facilitator and I am glad, GLAD to have taken the plunge and come here from London.

Finally at Kanpur

2009-06-15T10:16:00.000-04:00

We arrived at 7am in Kanpur but the train actually stopped at the station only at 8:15pm. It took us an hour to get from the station to IIT. On the way, the roadscape looked so dismal and dry that I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep.

IIT Kanpur is pretty much like the Chennai one, may be more roads and lesser area of woods. It certainly was hot. The Girls Hostel building was all squares and corridors, not one curve in sight. Our room was compact, with two single beds, as Suneetha and I were sharing the room. One plus was that it was right opposite to the restrooms (later proved to be a godsend... when the heat wouldn't allow us to sleep, we would wake up at all sorts of hours and stand under the shower...)

I kind of crashed for some time, while Suneetha went ahead and attended the inaugrual function. I, as usual, went late and entered the AC hall to find Anil Menon doing a group writing exercise. (More about the workshop tomm)

Stranded

2009-06-14T15:29:00.000-04:00

New Delhi Railway Station. AKA The Station from the Underbelly of Hell.

The minute there were seats available in Lichavi Express in the last 48 hours, I should have suspected something foul.

It was supposed to arrive at 3pm. It came at 1am the next day.

10 hours in crowded, hot NDLS with luggage and a thousand people sitting on the platform. Sitting, sleeping, eating, and in some cases pissing and shitting too. Add to that a sandstorm in the night, where everything, including our bodies, shone yellow.

Luckily, Suneetha and I parked our bums on a bench but you have NO idea how precarious our positions were. Eyes followed our every move, calculating when we would leave our bench. Scared witless about forsaking our bench and sitting amidst limbs and arms, we didn't even get up once in the 6 hours. Yep, no food or potty break.

There must be a reason why were were put through this. If there is, I haven't found it yet.

Though I have an entirely new appreciation for the people of DUNE.

I didn't have a camera with me...

2009-06-03T02:11:00.000-04:00

... when a 5-year old child leaned against my arm and whispered her wish to become a rock star, her face shining in trust that I would never betray her big secret.

... when she held a duck race in her pink bathtub every evening, willing her favourite duckie to win, and pouting when he didn't.

... when she lead me to the trampoline on sunny days, patiently teaching me to jump, and screaming delightfully when we played 'Crocodile grab me' in mid air.

The life of a nanny is filled with such moments. The child you wake up in the morning and tuck in at the night is not yours. You cannot kiss or hug her, since at a wrong moment, it can be percieved as perverse. There is no bond between you and her, save for the bond of employment, a crisp exchange of notes every Friday evening, in return for infinite care and affection during the week.

The real parents, often absent due to work and recreation, are such a jealous lot that you have to constantly check in your emotions and behave like a strict governess, instead of the indulgent nanny - otherwise, the child would love you more, which will render you jobless in a second.

It is impossible to take a picture of the child who has allowed you into her magical world and helped you rediscover innocence. You have to rely on your mind as the camera, and your memory as the storehouse for the pictures.

You can only hope that the pictures never get old.

What religion do I belong to?

2009-05-28T04:32:00.002-04:00

Some of my friends wonder - am I going to covert to Christianity?

This is probably because I regularly go to Church these days.

My answer: Just because I enjoy eating in restaurants, doesn't mean that I am going to stop cooking at home. Or buy deli food and eat it in a park.

I am not an atheist - it cannot be all a big fat co-incidence. I do believe in a Higher Power. What I don't believe is giving it a name, restricting it to a certain colour and entering it in a race ("Who is the best of all?")

I like the bits and pieces from each religion.

I like to be in a Hindhu temple because of its serenity, but I do NOT like it the concept of a punishing God or when menstruating women are not allowed inside. I HATE it when saffron-clad swamijis live like Kings and own Benz cars, while middle class people donate their ancestral lands to religious organisations, in the name of donation.

I like the sermons of a Church, but I do NOT like when it preaches that Man is a sinner and he has to repent all his life for his sins. I don't buy that. If Man sinned, why hasn't God just destroyed the whole world in a rage? If He can be angry enough to banish His children from Eden, why not just terminate it all and start afresh?

I like Islam, because it is actually a peaceful religion. The Quran says "...whosoever killeth a human being... it shall be as if he had killed all mankind, and whoso saveth the life of one, it shall be as if he had saved the life of all mankind... (5:32). But I do not like the burka, or the fact that it is the cradle of modern terrorism.

Buddhism, Jewish principles, Native American Beliefs... I pick the good things from all religion and shape my spirituality. Only in this way, I can get as much as possible from all religions.

This may sound blasphemous for some, but it is what works for me the best. I firmly believe that each person has to form his/her own manner of prayer and worship to his/her God.

Farewell to my 10-year old cat

2009-05-07T08:29:00.000-04:00

The second I heard my mom's quivering voice on the phone, I knew you were dead.

It is crazy that you chose to die of kidney failure just one month before i was due to return back home.

I’m so heartbroken for not being there with you… I am wondering what bad karma i had, to be excluded from your last moments on earth...

I have always been pragmatic about death. I probably would not cry if any of my friends or family dies. It is pointless to even cry, because we all are going to die anyway.

But I never even imagined a situation where I would miss the moment of farewell. That, to me, is worse than death, and trust the Fates to know that beforehand and use it to cripple me...

I am so angry at my personal situation that required me to be in London during the past few months, away from you...

I am feeling guilty because mom told me how much u missed me the past few months and I didn't think about u much bcos of my study commitments...

I am feeling terrible bcos I remember how many times I went straight to my room from work, without giving you a cuddle... and the times you had to sleep alone in the living room, when you wanted to sleep in my bed, I wouldn’t let you bcos you shed too much... I am so sorry about that too...

Jojo, mom is crying non-stop bcos she feels that she should have noticed the symptoms earlier and taken you to the vet... and here in London I am unable to cry bcos I KNOW I caused your death... had I been in India, I would have whisked you off to the vet the minute you looked unwell...

And my one wish to have you cremated, so that I can have your ashes in a urn, was not destined to come true... you were buried in a community cremation ground... and the stupid laws in India forbid women to enter there... so it looks like I won't even be able to look at the spot you were buried...

i am wondering... is this a punishment from god for the way i have been slacking off in the past few years? I'm sure it is. Otherwise, why would you leave me so suddenly, after being my only companion for the past 10 years? My only friend who didn't care that I was fat, average and lived a life full of mistakes?

I know u lived a happy life with us, u certainly wouldn‘t have lasted more than a year in that neughbourhood we rescued you from… but it really hurts that I was not able to give you so many things that you deserved to have… like balanced food or regular vet visits... u never had a garden to run about or a toy to play with or a brush just for yourself... i'm very very sorry for that... this is one of the few times I hate being middle-class in India… where pet “expenses” are considered a sin and a nuisance…

At this stage, I can only mourn for what i didn't do for you... may be, when this pain becomes a little more bearable, i can think about the happy times I spent with you... how grave and zen-like you normally were yet would comically do some stunts to make us laugh… the way your heard would droop enduringly when you fall asleep sitting… and how you loved to snuggle in our armpits… and the way you hissed and boo’ed at the street dogs, from safety of our balcony…

And how you “spoke” to the crows and pigeons in our terrace… how you will jump on us if you can smell food from our palms, as we come home from a restaurant… how you would terrorise my mom if she was cooking fish, bullying her so much that she would give you the lion’s share of it… and the way you terminated the rats in the neighbourhood, holding them in your jaws and making everyone run away from you ferocious gait into your corner in the house…

And the most happy memory of you I have is how I used to pick u up and keep you on my chest, while I lay on the sofa, watching TV… how mom used to shout it was unhygienic and that you might scratch me… and how wild it drove her when I kissed you on your nose or head… but I’m so glad I didn’t think bloody hygiene, am so glad I have you some love, in return to the unconditional love you have me for the past 10 years…

Farewell, my sweetie, my purr bucket, my mojo jojo… named after the cranky monkey of powerpuff girls, which you used to see with us when we were kids… all I can ask for is your forgiveness… for leaving you alone during your twilight years…

In case you ever wondered why I was gone… if you are being born again, please come into my life once again… I will know it is you if I can ever bear to touch another cat again…

------

A sign... may be?

2009-05-03T06:41:00.000-04:00

I attended the sunday mass today, at El-Shaddai, Golders Green.

I was blown away by the sermon.

It was my first sermon, in a church that celebrated god with music and dance. When I entered, I was surprised to see that the interior looked like that of an opera hall. Huge TVs hung from the cerling, and an orchestra played in the stage. Then the worship started. Beautiful songs praising Jesus and the God. I can always appreciate a religion which includes singing and dancing in its worship.

After worship, the sermon started and for the first time in my life, I listened to a 2-hr lecture without yawning once. That, by itself, is an achievement!

Secondly, the topic of the sermon. Lately, I have been praying for some sign that I am on the right path... and I think I have been answered. The topic was about how God has specific plans for us, and he leads us from one place to another, which may seem confusing and pointless to us, but is all a part of the big plan for us.

Because we may be blown away if we see the big picture too soon, God leads us slowly, haltingly, from one place to another, over the course of days, weeks, months. It may seem frustrating, it may seem tedious, it may even seem fruitless, but if we are patient enough, we will be rewarded one day.

I have to tell you - I could kiss the pastor for this sermon. No one in my life before has EVER said anything this positive, this encouraging. Sure, this is a Christian sermon, but I don't care - for me, God is God, without fancy names. He can be called Jesus or Krishna or Buddha, but for me, God is the humble pastor in a church, who plants hope and joy in the hearts of desperate people.

El-Shaddai International Christian Centre
http://www.elshaddai.org.uk/thechurch.htm

29...

2009-04-28T08:02:00.002-04:00

Happy birthday to me.

No. of Gifts: 3

Gifted by: Myself

----------------------
Gift no. 1: A (free) haircut
----------------------

It is a well-known fact that hairdressers in London are desperate for hair models. Gumtree.com is full of emails from the salons, looking for people to offer their (head) hair as a canvas for trainee hairdressers. The service is entirely free and perhaps my only chance on earth to use the services of top-end salons.

So I decided to volunteer my tresses and get a new look for my birthday. It took me nearly 20 minutes to find CITY CUTS. After alighting from St. James' Park, I stuttered and stumbled my way to the salon, which in reality is only a 5-min journey from the tube.

I admit, I was quaking when I sat on the salon chair. I have had so many horrifying haircuts in my life that I have almost lost any hope of getting a good one. Am I going to spoil my birthday now?

But it proved to be a great experience. Though the training happened in a cramped basement, the senior stylist was this cheerful guy who called everybody "darling" and immediately put me into ease. He listened patiently when I told him what I want for my fine, flyaway, super-thin and super-problematic hair, and he instructed an Italian intern to give me a graduated bob.

Yep, I had one.

And yep, it was sensational.

I am NEVER going back to long, stringy, limp hair. Ever.

----------------------
Gift no. 2: Buffet Lunch
----------------------
There is a road that's adjacent to Artillery Row (SW1), which is some kind of a flea market. I had a buffet lunch there, for 5 pounds. Not great, but not bad either - good enough for a fiver. I did miss not having dessert.

----------------------
Gift no. 3: The cheapest and most fabulous clothes shop in London
----------------------
Best part of the day - I discovered this great little shop FRENCH KISS, which had the most amazing clothes, all costing.... 5 pounds.

I am SO hitting it again as soon as I get my salary next week...

One of my fav web comics (quick read)

2009-04-23T12:29:00.000-04:00

The Right Number is a projected three-part online graphic novella about math, sex, obsession and phone numbers presented in an unusual zooming format.

http://www.scottmccloud.com/1-webcomics/trn-intro/index.html

How do you really know if you are on the right road?

2009-04-20T07:58:00.001-04:00

I am frustrated.

Because I do not know where I am going.

How do you know? Who shows you the path? Who tells you the way? What sign is revealed to you?

And how positive can you be that your eyes and ears will be open when some one shows you, tells you, signs you?

The more I progress, the more I get restless. The progress seemes increasinly meaningless to me.

So I can write. So I can write well. So I am published. So I am good looking, healthy, affluent... SO WHAT?

What is the purpose of it all?

I pray everyday for some sign, that I am here, in earth, for some kind of purpose. I hope I get it soon. There is no wait as torturous as waiting for your destiny.

Compliments and complaints

2009-04-14T01:05:00.002-04:00

It happened again today. I was called downstairs around 9pm and shown some juice stains on the floor. "I know it's late and that this is a bit anal, but I pay a cleaner and I don't want to come home to a dirty kitchen," said my employer. "You have GOT to make sure that the place is spic and span after the kids' tea time."

I admit, I was caught off-guard. I thought of the countless number of times I have cleaned up in the past 3 months, both on weekdays..... and many weekend mornings too, when I am not paid to do it, just because I wanted to make their weekends a little easy. I thought how the kids would always ask me to make their tea and breakfast even during weekends, when I'm not working and how I gladly obliged them.

I thought of the way I spend a pound every week to get sweeties for them because they always ask me what I have got for them when I come home from a sunday outing. I thought of the times I went without dinner because her husband would come in from work just when I was about to eat and express interest in the food and I would have no choice but to offer my share.

Lastly, I thought of how my legs would ache after I run around every day, making dinner for three hungry kids and tidying up the kitchen as much as I could possibly do while helping them do their homework.

And I have to confess that I almost lost my temper.

But if my employer was anal about cleanliness, I'm anal about confrontations. I just gritted my teeth, smiled and told her, "Sure, I will clean it up tomorrow."

I realise now that what I should have said is, "I always tidy up everyday after tea time EVERY SINGLE DAY, but if the kids make a mess in the kitchen AFTER I retire to my room, there isn't much I can do."

Well, I will save it for another day. I really don't understand... How can a juice stain on the floor on the DINING ROOM mean a dirty kitchen? How can any one hope for a spic and span kitchen all the time when there are 3 children in the house?

And - this is a same-side goal, I know - WHY is it that one doesn't find any pleasure in routine compliments but gets upset on an occasional criticism? Yes, my employers have told me frequently that I'm doing a great job with the kids, and till now, all their (polite) complaints have been on the housekeeping part of mine.

But this is the best I can do! Seriously! I have never cleaned up so religiously in my entire life!

Oh well.

London Book Fair - nearly 30% off for online registration

2009-04-10T00:02:00.000-04:00

The London Book Fair is the global marketplace for rights negotiation and the sale and distribution of content across print, audio, TV, film and digital channels. Ticket price is £40, but if you register online, you get £15 off!

Event schedule
http://www.londonbookfair.co.uk/page.cfm/Action=Seminars/t=m

I will be there on all four days, except for April 18.
Special guests:
James Patterson, bestselling author
Vikas Gupta
Anita Nair
William Darlymple
and many others

Registration at -

http://www.londonbookfair.co.uk/page.cfm/Action=Team/t=m

Resisting the urge to... advice

2009-03-28T08:21:00.008-04:00

Some time ago, I emailed a writer, a fellow acquaintance, quite successful in the world of commercial writing. We used to be `email` pals so when I read her submissions in a critique group I belonged to, I wrote to her about how similar our lives are. I am a few years older than her, so I saw her, in the pattern of her life now, living in a situation which will be a huge impact on the next few decades. So I added a few sentences in my email about certain good and bad decisions I had taken in my life, and basically telling her to weigh in all pros and cons.

I certainly wasn't interfering or telling her what she should do with her life. I wish all the time that some one mentored me when I was young and stupid, so I really didn't think that I had crossed any limits - in my mind, I was simply sharing tips with a fellow writer from my country. She and I used to be quite pally-pally in the early days when we both were struggling freelancers, so I assumed that it's not out of line to send an email like that.

But I received no reply at all for that email, and since I knew the writer was relocating to another country during the time I mailed, I thought she was just too busy to keep track of her things. But I was surprised - I knew her email was working, so I always wondered what was up with that. Did I offend her with any of my comments?

If yes, I hoped she had replied back to me, instead of acting like a school girl. Because I found recently why she didn't reply my mail for a long time. I read a post in her blog, which was basically a rant against all people who sent her unwanted advice in email. It was obvious who she was hinting at - yours truly.

Now, possibly this person did get unsolicited email about her personal life and she has every right to hate them. Still, I was really hurt that my email - which, I swear to God, wasn't about gossip but was every bit genuine and full of friendly advice - too was classified as one of the irritating ones. If that was the case, then I would have appreciated a reply that said `Drop dead, Rads`, instead of a roundabout post in her blog, mocking all the people who emailed her (yes, she got a lot of emails - but that's what happens when you talk about your choices and your personal life all the time).

After reading her acerbic post, I wandered around a few days, feeling as if kicked in the shin, and gradually recovered. It is her loss that she is so full of herself she can't differentiate between genuine emails and gossipy ones. I have learned time and again that people change once they taste the fruits of success. It was my mistake to assume that this person would be the same as before, when she was up and coming.

And I, obviously being the wiser one, should learn to mind my business more.

Can there be a better breakfast than THIS?

2009-03-26T07:25:00.006-04:00

Soft cream cheese and strips of smoked salmon on a wheat bagel, with a sprinkling of sesame seeds and a twist of lime.

A small bowl of (1) sliced banana and (5) chopped walnuts.

Muller's probiotic Rasperry Yogurt drink.

Sure, it totaled 500 calories and £3 (the bagel was 2.65 at Waitrose) but even a budgeting dieter can afford to have a rich breakfast once a week. And this one has all necessary nutrients - good carbs (banana), omega 3 (salmon and walnut), fibre (wholewheat bagel), and digestion-aiding culture (Muller drink). Not to mention tasty cream cheese to satisfy the glutton in you!

Yum. Yum. Yummyyyyyyyyyyy.

So to answer my question above, NO.

I'm. in. Toothache. Hell.

2009-03-24T02:21:00.003-04:00

I had the most horrible toothache for the past 2 days. Before coming here, I had a root canal treatment in India and it was the most bitter winter in 18 years when I arrived in London; I think the combination of a root-canalled tooth and sub-zero temperatures made sure that the pain will flare up every now and then, if I get careless and eat anything that's too hot or too cold.

Now, this is good news for my dieting, as it means that I cannot have hot fudge or ice cream. But it also means that I cannot drink steaming soups or anything straight from the oven, even if it is baked sweet potatoes. Arrrrggggghh!

And forget about going to a dentist in the UK, esp. if you have no dental insurance. A simply checkup is 75 pounds, so god knows how much it will cost to get my tooth alright. I am better off spending that money on a flight ticket to home. At least I can be with my family for some time!

So, advice to people thinking about leaving their country to work in a cold country - please take care of your teeth and make sure they are in top-top condition when you reach your new residence. Otherwise, you might have to survive on painkillers and clove oil, like me.

Happy Birthday, E!

2009-03-21T06:40:00.003-04:00

I'm quite bummed today.

It's the birthday of one of the kids I au pair, and I was not invited for the matinee show. So when everybody is running around, getting ready for the movie, I am just sitting inside my room, wondering what is wrong. Friends and relatives are here for the party, and I have not been told anything by the parents. Should I stay? Should I leave, if they are having an event? There is a cake in the fridge, so am I to be there in the party?

Just as I was thinking this, the voices of the family singing HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU reached my ears. For a second, I thought they were cutting the cake and I was incredibly sad. Then I realised it is 9am and nobody cuts a cake in the morning! They must be waking up the girl by singing to her and giving her presents.

After feeling sorry for myself for a few minutes, I just made up my mind to go out and meet my friends. My host family is generally very cordial and generous to me (for e.g., they always give me their own travelcard to use in the weekends) so I had to conclude that they were not ignoring me deliberately.

May be they want their space, to be their family time. May be they just forgot, because it is all so hectic. I AM kind of an introvert, and I have made it clear many times that I value peace over mayhem so may be they thought I wouldn't want to participate in a noisy b'day party.

So instead of wrecking my mental peace, I just gave my present to the birthday girl and made a graceful exit. Life's too short to worry about these things!

Fed up of Moaners

2009-01-30T04:41:00.004-05:00

I'm often annoyed at people who are always cribbing at their lives. I am sick of them transferring their bloatings into me, depressing me. Their laments are always in these lines:

Oh I wish I had better hair/lips/hips/whatever (You are healthy and intelligent and educated. You are not poor and you are not ugly. Plus you live in the era of internet and actually own a computer. You have a job and you can go to a spa if you want to. Therefore you belong to the tiny % of the world population who are luckier than the others. Asking for something more than that is asking for a kick in the ass from the Fates)

Oh I have so much to do, so many peaks to conquer I can never rest till I have attained them all (Talk about having insecurity issues. Only fools refuse to feel happiness at small accomplishments. By the way, Do not call me when it is lonely at the peak, IF you ever find one that has enough space to fit you)

Oh I am so talented but I am wasted in this company (Are you a baby? Just resign and look for another job. There is no other solution.)

Oh I so much want to do something for the world (For God's sake, move your lazy ass from the telly on weekends and visit the nearest charity)

And then there are those who speak and act in the following language: ME ME ME LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! LOOK HOW FAR I HAVE COME! ALL BY MYSELF! I AM THE SUPERMAN/WOMAN! HEAR ME PRAISE MYSELF 24/7! AIN'T I SO GOOD! AIN'T I THE BEST! BAH BLAH BAAAAAH!

And here's what I have to tell all these losers who don't know how lucky they are and spend their time bemoaning their problems or laughing at others: EAT SHIT, PLEASE.

View of Thames over Richmond Hill

2009-01-17T02:35:00.001-05:00

Thresholds - a day retreat to define 2009

2009-01-12T01:45:00.000-05:00

The day retreat was great. It was organized and conducted by Roselle Angwin, author of Writing the Moment. I came away with a sheet that had my goals for 2009 on it and a heart which was loads lighter sans pentup guilt and pain. It was a retreat that targeted both the psyche and the mind. I wish more of these were in India.

Probably the three best things I liked about the retreat are:

1. How Roselle used the day to give us writing exercises to write about our past and the present. She made us be really be honest with ourselves... most answers were private, so there was no need to be superficial.

2. She frequently said this - be gentle with yourself. I wish people had said that to be before. Roselle herself was the embodiment of gentleness... her quiet and warm way of talking soothed all of us.

3. Potluck! LOL. Everyone had bought something to share for lunch, and it was one of the tastiest potlucks I have ever been to. Yumm!

So. For those who'd like to know what the course is all about, here's the flyer:

THRESHOLDS - this wild and precious life

Change your life with this day retreat course…

Using writing as a tool it’s a chance to look at where you are: your essential values, your visions, dreams and goals, your work/life balance, your loves, achievements and losses over the past year, your creative life, and what you'd like to create for yourself in the next year – all in the safe support of a friendly group.

10am – 4pm £40/£30 concessions

Refreshments will be provided but please bring vegetarian lunch to share

TO BOOK:

www.fire-in-the-head.co.uk

roselle@fire-in-the-head.co.uk

Couchsurfing with Elly

2009-01-11T23:07:00.000-05:00

I had never tried anything so daring before - COUCHSURFING!

There was a day retreat in Exeter, a town about 3 hrs away from London, that I was very interested to attend, but my travel options kind of allowed me to be in the town only for a night. I would read Exeter on saturday night, and leave on sunday evening! I really didn't want to spend 25 pounds on a hotel JUST for a night... hence I researched and found Elly on the couchsurfing website.

As I arrived in Exeter quite late in the night, Elly was kind enough to pick me up from the coach station and drove me to her gorgeous one-bed flat. Her couch was so cozy and warm! And so was Elly - she was such a lovely person! This is my first couchsurfing experience and I kept wondering what I have gotten myself into - I who am such a paranoid person!

But Elly put all my doubts to rest, she had cooked a great dinner for me - sweet potato pie with pita bread - and we spent a couple of hours talking (sorry if I kept you awake, Elly!) about everything under the earth. The next day, she walked with me to the town center and made sure I found the address. Talk about friendly souls and the kindness of strangers!

Thanks, Elly, for your reference in my profile and I hope to see you soon!

Richmond Park, near my house

2009-01-09T02:38:00.002-05:00

My first class at Birkbeck

2009-01-07T21:01:00.000-05:00

It was bizarre to be sitting inside a class again after five years. But definitely not unpleasant. For the first time in my life, I was a student in a place I wanted to be, about to study a subject I am crazy about. I'm taking the 6-month creative writing module at University of Birkbeck, London.

I knew that wednesdays were going to be hell... I need to drop the kids at the school at 9am, and then run to the rail station to catch a train to Waterloo, and then change to tube, then walk 10 min to the class... and did I mention the class started at 10:30am. So it was like a mad race against time, but here's what's so perfect - the transport system in London is so punctual, the trains arrive on the dot and I always manage to get to class with a few minutes to spare!

It was a surreal walk from the tube station to the university buildings in Russell Square. The place reminded me of Union Square in NYC... the same architecture, shop facades, shops. But the people were better dressed and more relaxed, heheheh. It was fun to gawk at the buildings! I know - I studied architecture at college and I should not be so bown away by the first world architecture, but I am always awed when I see a fantastic facade or a magnificient building. It's so difficult to be blase about it!

So when I reached the university buildings, I felt so much at peace, looking at the students and the lecturers walking by, talking animatedly. Looked like I am finally going to get the college experience that would be a good memory. I reached my class in time and took a seat right next to the instructor. Well, one more first! I was always the backbencer at school and college ;)

The first class was more like an ic-breaker session. We all, about 14 of us, introduced ourselves and then Sara Boyes, the course instructor, introduced the sessions and the syllabus. I already knew more about it because I have been reading the course link every day for the past 3 months, LOL. I liked the way we did exercises and then discussed about them... I am so used to email critiques that I had missed talking - as in verbal communication - with fellow writers. I sure feels good to look at a person and smile and talk about what you wrote!

As the hour progressed, I began to realise - contrary to whatever people might say or I might think during weak moments, investing the time and money to get away and do a course like this is perhaps the best decision I had ever taken in my life.

Day in the life of an au pair

2009-01-05T18:03:00.000-05:00

So I am going to be the live-in au pair for the Norman family (name changed), for their 3 daughters. The last one if a kintergardener and would be my special ward. My working hours are weekdays 7:30am to 9am, and 3pm to 7pm. I can take up any p/t work on my free hours, and apart from free room and food, I also get a pocket money of 100 pounds per week.

My day begins like this:

5:30am
Get up and freshen up. Do some browsing, answer emails, update blog. Eat a bowl of cereal.

7:30am
Wake up the kids. The older ones will get ready by themselves, but I need to dress and feed the youngest one, who's 4. Make sure they have their bags and put on their warm clothes. Lock the house, switch on the alarm and drop them at school (a 5 min bus ride away).

9:15am
Return home. On wednesdays alone, I go straight from school to central london to attend college till 1pm. Clean up the kitchen. Make breakfast and watch TV till 11am.

11am to 2pm
Writing time.

2pm to 2:45pm
Heat up a bowl of soup for lunch. Usually call parents to talk, or might again watch some TV. Leave home at 2:45pm.

3pm - 5pm
Pick up kids from school. Bring them home, make dinner, and serve them at 5pm. Make sure they have a bath and change before coming down for dinner.

5:30pm to 6pm
Clean up kitchen and put kids' clothes to wash.

6pm to 7pm
Get the kids to do their homework. If they don't have any, make them tidy up their rooms and then allow them to watch TV.

7pm to 8pm
Usually take a relaxed bath and then take my dinner upstairs. Then I might go out for a stroll, which I don't do often, since it's dark and cold outside.

8pm to 9pm
Read a book. I LOVE the library here! Have already checked out a dozen books.

9pm
Sleep sweet sleep. I have to, since I am practically comatose by exhaustion!

Got a job!

2009-01-02T10:16:00.001-05:00

I think I must be the only person who got a job within 5 days of landing in London....

But then I cheated - I had been job searching on the Net since November when I got my visa!
I decided to be an au pair because it offered me the flexibility to study during the day time (when the kids were at school) and also took care of my room+board. And yes, I loveeeeeeee kids and I infinitely prefer to do a childcare job than fry chicken or serve customers... so I put up an ad at Gumtree.com and had several interviews before coming to UK...

It was terrible going to these interviews, though... I had to dress like an Arctic explorer, find the routes on the internet, blow up money on transport (which sucked, bcos I usually had to take 2 trains + 3 buses to get to the houses), and meet each family with the same smile and answer the same questions. I also fell sick on those days, and had to cancel out of a few ones.

I had shortlisted 2 families on my list - the first one was ideal, as there was only one child to take of. Unfortunately, the family never contacted me after asking me to call them.

The second one was a family with 2 middle schoolers and I really liked them - it was a single paents family, which was perfect. But the next day, they said they had chosen another au pair based on references. Oh well.

The third was a family of five living in Richmond Park, and really not on my list! But from the moment when Mom picked me up at the bus stop till she dropped me back home (yes! she really did that!), I had such a lovely time at their house, meeting the kids, who were real poppets. The Mom was really warm and Dad really didn't talk that much - my perfect combination of employers! - and the kids appeared to really like me, and when I saw the hopping deer on the park, I was so content that I said then and there that I would be their au pair!

Yes, I am nervous, and yes, I know I will make mistakes. But somehow, I am feeling happier at this moment then I was when I became the managing editor of a website!

Australia

2008-12-30T13:01:00.001-05:00

I am once again in the world of empty theatres and I am HAPPY!

While I love watching movies in Satyam RDX - the BEST theatre in the world, really, I have travelled in four continents so far and have NEVER found any that matched Satyam - I really didn't get used to the idea of having to book tickets 3 days in advance and then fighting the crowd to enter the hall. That's why the theatres in the first world always fascinate me - they are always empty, any time of the day!

So Archana and I finally braved the climate - alright, I did, the temp hardly affected her, grrrrr - packed ourselves some snacks and hit the nearest Cineworld (in Kilburn). I am sucker for epic dramas and I did love Australia, possibly the most cliched movie on earth. But who cares - Hugh Jackman is half naked in the movie!

Finally, in London

2008-12-28T13:49:00.001-05:00

I'm here. In the land of Arthur Conan Doyle, Enid Blyton, and Agatha Christie. Not to mention J K R.

It was dark when I landed y'day at Heathrow. My friends whisked me off to Kingsbury in a radio taxi and I didn't get to see much, but today morning when I looked out of my window, I was blown away by the view. Acres of park, bordered by picture-perfect victorian cottages. School children in uniform and insanely-fit joggers with their dogs. The world was clad in winter fashion, tight clothes and high boots, somehow more striking and chic than the little black dress.

So, what's the snake in paradise?

Minus 5 degrees, that's what.

Brrrr.

Green Park Resort, Pattaya: Beautiful!

2008-12-22T00:36:00.002-05:00

I stayed in Green Park Resort for two nights and three days during the second week of Dec 2007. We were a family of four.

What are the pluses?

1. BIG plus... we checked in at 10am, and they didn't bat an eyelid. Their check-in policy says 2pm, but our flight landed us in Thailand at 5am, so we really didn't have any choice. I realize that if the room had been busy, we could have ended up waiting in the lobby, but it was so nice to see smiling faces, when we were all set for a battle with the management!

2. We got the newly renovated family suite in the first floor, which was spotless, clean, and overlooked the beautiful pool area. The air-conditioner worked only too well, I was always cold, but I guess westerners would be delighted. The fridge was stocked well and the phone service was prompt.

3. The place was so beautiful, and pleasant to stroll around. It was so hot in Thailand even in December, and it was cool inside the resort, due to the greenery. The pool, esp., looked fabulous....

4. The place is located in a respectable part of the town, if you get what I mean. I hardly saw an older man with a younger woman in this hotel... but may I just got lucky. I did see a lot of elderly tourists.

5. Last, but not the least, was the breakfast buffet. So many dishes.... yumm!

Minuses... yes I have 2 -
1. I had booked a day trip with a local travel agent and when they had called up in the morning asking for us, the front desk told them there was nobody in the hotel in our name! I mean... I do agree that my last name is Indian and may sound tongue-twisty, but that very fact should have alerted them, don't you think?

In the end, after many calls since 7am (or so the travel agent tells me), the agency sent a person to meet us in the lobby, which he did. And I cam down around 10am and sat there right before him... and we didn't know each other! Lol, it was almost funny. After some time, this guy very hesitantly asks me if I was Ms. M, and I rely yes, and we had this really funny introduction :)

2. The hotel sells internet cards at 100 baht per hour, the ones which keep tab on how long u use the net and when the one hour is done, you are automatically logged out. It was too costly, which by itself is terrible, when you have an excellent cybercafé outside for 1 baht per minute, but the net at Green Park was so slow... and get this, even when the connection went dead, the time in the card kept on getting reduced! I remember getting awfully mad cos' of this...

In summary, I think Green Park is a cool resort, a beautiful place to stay with the family or significant other. My only caution tip would be - don't browse the net there!

Thai massage at Oryza spa (Chennai)

2008-12-11T23:56:00.014-05:00

Thanks to working before the computer 8 hours a day (not to mention the 2 hours I spend at home browsing the net), my neck and back are in constant unease. I had heard about the Thai massage long back, even before visiting Thailand, but the procedure always managed to keep me away. I mean, letting another human being stand on my poor back? No can do.

But y'day, as I made my bi-monthly visit to Oryza spa in Chennai (the only place where I spend without reservations - apart from the library), I was struck by a sudden urge to try it out. I usually do reflexology (you can read my review here), but since my upper body was making me wince, I decided to try thai massage. After copious amounts of reassurance from the spa attendant ("Yes Ma'am, you spinal cord will be perfectly intact after the session"), I followed my masseuse, a very petite Indonesian lady named Jaya.

Jaya took me into a small room (2m x 4m) and left me alone. I dressed myself in loose-fitting spa clothes (the Thai massage is done on a fully-clothed body) and lay down on my back on the mat. She came in and switched off the lights. Hello! Before I screamed, she switched on a very dim light. Aha, so that's it. I had no problem with dim lighting, the harsh yellow light will definitely not be very conducive for a resting massage.

What followed in the hour after is not quite pleasant, yet not unpleasant either. When my arms ache after typing, I kind of softly plummet them on a bouncy surface, to work out the kinks. Now, imagine if that's been done to your entire body. Jaya started with my legs. She kind of poked (but it didn't feel like poking, more like pressing) my legs using her hands and legs (yes, legs), pulled them, twisted them and kneaded them. She did the same for my hands. It was very relieving, rather than relaxing, because that urge to get a nice hard knock on a particularly persistent ache - she was exactly doing that.

Then I was made to lie on my stomach, and she stood on me. STOOD ON ME! Now I understand why thai massage is done by petite people. Jaya actually stood on my legs and started stretching my arm backwards! And I could hear popping sounds and creaks all over! Nothing painful, but a little alarming if you are doing it for the first time. Then she put her entire body weight on my back.

Yeaaoooowww!!!! It was a little too much in the beginning, as my face was crushed on the pillow and I couldn't breathe for the second whenever she was giving short pushes on my spine. But it didn't feel painful... it felt really, REALLY good. So that's what it was - pulling and stretching and pressing and bending your body in different postures. It was like yoga on demand. Little wonder, because it seems Thai massage originated in India!

The session lasted an hour and ended with a nice but short head massage. After the session, I did feel good. Not great, which is how I feel after a reflexology session, but definitely GOOD. Worth a try at least once in your lifetime!

1500rs per 60 minutes
http://www.oryzadayspa.காம்
Branches in Chennai and Bangalore

How You Can Change the World

2008-12-09T05:22:00.009-05:00

Derek Turner at Ngorongoro Crater. Photo by Derek Turner.

How You Can Change the World Through Volunteer Work

By Derek Turner from The World By Sea

Find a need. Fill a need.

For many of us there comes a point in life, when you take pause, look around and realize we have it pretty good. It’s that moment when you discover that no matter how many points the Dow has dropped, or how high gas prices have become, we still live like kings and queens compared to a lot of people in the world. Then comes the wave of guilt, compassion, inspiration - whatever it is that moves a person to say: “ I want to do something. I, (insert full name here), want to make a difference.”

This is probably the biggest step: realizing that we can, even should, make a difference. But then, after that beautiful, humbling moment of self-realization where we decide YES (I am going to change the world!), comes the more complicated and often de-motivating, “how.” This step, as it turns out, is even more difficult than first.

After that beautiful, humbling moment of self-realization where we decide YES, comes the more complicated and often de-motivating, “how.”Volunteering is a broad term. It can be as simple or complicated as you like. It can mean anything from picking up trash, to serving bread at a soup kitchen, to serving on the front lines for a country you love. You don’t have go anywhere to do it, but if you’re like me and would rather travel than stay home, the opportunities are endless.

3 weeks left for the Big Move

2008-12-06T03:53:00.005-05:00

I am still in wonder. What happened? Who applied for the working holidaymaker visa, one that has a 98% rejection rate in India? Who slogged through collecting all the documents, keeping it a secret, in fear of being jinxed? And who finally got it? Was it.... me?

Yes, it was! I am going to an year-long working holiday in UK!!!

It all happened so fast and so furious that I still can't believe I am leaving by this month end. It all happened because of my longtime friend, Archana. She left to UK to join her husband and while leaving, she threw a sentence at me: "Why don't you come too?"

And I thought: "Well, why not?"

For quite some time now, I have been feeling restless. In case you do not know me, I am afflicted with a deadly disease: travel lust. I can't stay at one place for a long time. I just have to move, at least for some time, before I return. But the restlessness was not only because of it, it was also because of my writing - or the absence of it.

I have a very good job. One of the best jobs in the country, for someone like me, I should add. I work as the online editor for a children's magazine. But editing and writing are two different things, and I have not written anything worthwhile in the past couple of years (ince I stopped freelancing and started full time jobs).

Now, it is killing me. I am not able to sleep at nights and I am constantly on edge. The only time I feel peaceful is when I write, uninterrupted. NOT possible when you work full time. I am feeling a call from some place, beckoning me to just drop everything and WRITE. So... I am answering that call, and applied for a work visa to UK and got it. I have already lived in the USA. UK is the next frontier :)

I am not going back to full-time freelancing. I am going to use this year-break to enroll into a writing course - my long time dream. I am going to study P/T in the University of London (Birkbeck) and I am just going to write. I am at a point where I need feedback on my fiction or just wither away. Thanks to my fulltime jobs in India, I have saved some money using which I can comfortably move to UK.

And after that? Well, when I began to actually starve (and become thin - yay!!!!!!!), I will get one, just to pay my rent and food. Just enough, so that I can devote the rest of the time to write.

So... if you are in London and happen to look deep into the supermarket tiller while checking out your purchase, say hi.... it might just be me!

CLIPS: Chandamama Dec 2008 (English)

2008-12-02T07:23:00.002-05:00

Two of my stories - BAN PIN SHAN and SECOND HELPINGS - are published in the december issue of the revamped Chandamama maagzine.

One is a retelling of an ancient Vietnamese tale, and the other is a contemporary "Hum-tum" style story of sparring friends.

Subscription link is here.

Buy: Any neighbourhood newsmart near your house! (if you live in India)

Diet 2009

2008-12-01T22:09:00.001-05:00

From today, I plan to eat small quantities of healthy food at certain times of the day, before I start to feel real hunger.

7am - water therapy (for overall elimination)

8:15am - Diet Delite breakfast (high-fiber)

11pm - one carrot stick + cuccumber, diced (vit A)

1pm - chicken/tofu tropical salad in fresh mayo (protein + biotin)

4pm - 2 pieces garlic bread (carbs)

7:30pm - dinner of veg soup OR chappathi and sabji (without ghee or masala)

Will this work? Gotta wait and see!

Small helpings

2008-12-01T21:53:00.000-05:00

For the first time in several years, I ate moderately.

I use the word moderate because I am sure it is not low-fat or low-carb or low-anything. But I had small quantities.

In the morning I had MTR's Diet Delite - 1 packet. It's a porridgy mixture mainly made of wheat. For lunch around 1pm, I had tropical chicken salad (chicken slivers + pine apple + mayo) and 2 pieces of garlic bread. The remaining two pieces of garlic bread I ate around 5pm, when the hunger pangs hit the hardest.

It was a shock to know that I could feel this full after eating small packets of salad and bread.

In the evening, around 7pm, I had a small bowl of sweet corn with lime and pepper. Now, I am ready to sleep.

For those who are not my friends, I am suffering from a weight gain problem. Partly because of heredity and partly because of gluttony. I generally eat huge quantities of rice and fried food morning, noon and night (hence the double chin and jelly belly). If I go without samosas or rice for over 12 hours, my body will revolt. Headaches and tummy aches will crop up, accompanied by a murderous rage.

But today... nothing. I felt warm and full. So that's the secret... to eat BEFORE the stomach starts to complain its hunger. Because once your body realises that it's hunger and panics, nothing can stop you from demolishing all your diet plans.

WHM visa: 6 basic documents needed

2008-10-30T02:29:00.024-04:00

It often amazes me when I come across certain queries on the net, posted by aspiring Working Holidaymakers. They sent out questions asking for minimum bank balance and application procedure and interview techniques. One person even wanted a copy of holiday plan that he can duplicate!

I am completely flummoxed... How can anybody just post questions on a forum and EXPECT magic solutions to be offered to them, if they are not even willing to do basic research? A visa is a serious matter. It's not a lottery or a charity. You are entering alien domain, another country and naturally, you need to be prepared. Wouldn't you prepare before taking an exam? And instead of relying on somebody's views, it is always best to do the research by yourself.

But then, not all people might have unlimited access to internet (may be you are based in a town where internet speed is not reliable) - nor can many have the leisure of time to sit for weeks or months and do research before actually applying (which is what I did). So, for those people who genuinely do not know where to start, please find below the 6 basic documents you need to apply for WHM.

--------------------------------------

If you want to browse a comprehensive site on Working Holidaymaker visas of the world, go to http://www.whmvisa.blogspot.com

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1. A bank balance of a min. 5000 pounds - original bank statement shd be given.
The UK site says it is min. 2600 pounds, but I know lots who got rejected after showing that amount… so it is always better to show more. Even if you have a sponsor, the amount shd be in YOUR account... recently, my friend got rejected because her sponsor's (her father’s) money, over 10k pounds, was not in HER account.

2. Detailed holiday plan
I mean, DETAILED... bcos if the holiday plan is very brief or general, the visa officers will immediately conclude that the applicant is not very serious abt holidaying in UK… they will decide that you want to go to work.

3. Future job offer
from existing/new employer OR letter from your parent/husband/wife/fiancée saying that you will return OR similar (up to your personal situation)

4. A one-way flight ticket (mandatory) or a return flight ticket (excellent)
Yes, you have to do this, it’s a great way of proving that you are returning back. You definitely need to put aside the amount and take this step if you badly want to get the WHM visa. Many have got the visa without keeping this, but I am talking about current times where things are complicated, and esp. in India, they expect return flight ticket printouts.

5. Personal covering letter with a promise to return back.
This is important. I heard it from a lot of consultants that most applicants just keep the required documents. Trust me, it pays to to write polite introduction letter about yourself. It might make the officer know more about you and then make a decision.

6. Proof of accommodation.
If you don't know anybody, a confirmed booking at a hotel or a hostel - for a minimum of 2-4 weeks - is more than enough. If you do have relatives' place to stay, get them to give appropiate sponsorship letters, including council tax documents. Looking back, I see that most of my friends had problems only when they showed letters from their relatives offering them free lodging and boarding in UK!

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The above 6 things are COMPULSORY, no matter what other tells you, you HAVE to have these in your documents folder (along with your completed application form, passport, and photos)

You are, of course, free to keep more documents that might help your case. Many say that a NOC letter from current employer is a big plus (however, you can get it only if you have a good rapport with your superior!). Other documents that might help are graduation certificates, PF account proof, savings scheme certificates, property documents or FD passbooks (in your name preferably) - all in ORIGINAL.

If you want to browse a comprehensive site on Working Holidaymaker visas of the world, go to http://www.whmvisa.blogspot.com

Happy Diwali!

2008-10-27T09:20:00.008-04:00

I stood in my rooftop terrace and watched in glee as colourful fireworks exploded on th sky above. They were like mini-rocket bombs! I usually find it difficult to laugh while coughing in all that cracker smoke, but no one can resist smiling at the colours above... specks of green, red and gold dotting the sky. My legs refused to move, even though I realised that it was actually dangerous to stand like this, barefoot and clothed in a cotton dress. It was like being in a battlefield, with all the sounds and smoke - a happy battlefield, if there is one!

After half an hour, I finally came downstairs and sat before the comp. I tried to concentrate and finish my work, I had a few deadlines at work... had to finish a couple of stories for the magazine I was working for, yet, it was difficult to. The sounds of firecrackers were defeaning... and I, who can't work if a mosquito burped loudly, didn't mind it at all!

Perhaps that's Diwali. It catches upon you, and you just can't avoid it. I am not big of festivals, but this one is very tough to ignore.

Generally I make a point never to go out during Diwali season... you never know when you are going to step on a landmine, oops sorry, firecracker. But Diwali comes to you... the way you start when an especially loud cracker goes off, when your pet hides under the bed for 3 continious days, when you feast on sweets and dosas non stop, when you get a weekday off from work, when kids ... Diwali is there in your life.

Article in 4INDIANWOMAN

2008-06-14T13:01:00.001-04:00

WHY A RETREAT?
By Radhika Meganathan

More than 2 years ago, when I came back from US to India after completing a magazine internship, I had utterly lost the urge to write. Reverse culture shock (the transition from NYC to Chennai was very disheartening), myriad family issues and some disturbing health concerns had zapped my creative muscles. For someone who was earning close to Rs. 1 lakh a month, it was dismal to be faced with the sad CTCs offered to editors.

Thankfully, I had a portfolio of published books so I had enough assignments to keep myself afloat (and not money from Papa). For nearly five months since returning from USA, I was busy freelancing and kicking myself for coming back, when a MNC approached me for the post of a copy editor. It dangled a very attractive pay package, and fate was all but sealed – who will possibly have energy to write while battling umpteen deadlines in a corporate environment?

Let me tell you how a life in a nightshift KPO is. I was surrounded by MBAs and PGs, intelligent enough to be a good company and young enough to laugh a lot. Friendships were quickly formed, since you might not have much to do on a lean week. Meals are free, the company cab picks up and drops you at your place, and every month, a fat pay cheque is deposited into the account. Life becomes positively a bed of roses.

Oh, I forgot the thorns! Everyday, you battle deadlines... nerves are frayed, tempers run hot, and till the deadline is safely met, no dares to even move away from the desk. And if a deadline is missed... there are more enquiries and paperwork and phone calls to be faced with, IN ADDITION to the everyday tasks. So people generally are very careful not to miss a deadline... which means ... yes, non-stop work and worrying.

I won't say that I disliked my job. Copyediting was fine and fed my stomach but my Muse was starved. I left home when my Mom started preparing dinner and I back when the milkmaid deposited two milk cartons outside my house gate.

I never did anything about it, though… but I was always aware of that niggling voice inside my tired mind. “You need some rest” it would whisper, “Make some time for it. Or else….it will be too late…”

I was terrified about the "or else” factor… and anybody who has worked in a cubicle 10+ hours a day will understand the urge to relax in a place where the colours of earth soothe your mind. And that’s why, in August 2006, I chose Pondicherry. Apart from being a well-known (ahem) fun place, it also was located near the Auroville – that universal township existing in mystic tranquility.

And I decided to make it a writers’ retreat, because I wanted to find my lost muse. For some time, the writers’ groups I belonged to wanted to meet on a retreat and I thought, why don’t I do it?

Of course I didn’t know anything about planning a retreat. The only experience I have had before was planning family outings. Besides, with the help of Google and mobile phones, how horrible can your judgment be?

Read more

My Interview in The Hoot

2008-06-10T12:21:00.000-04:00

A WOMEN WRITERS' RETREAT

What do a bunch of journalists do when they organize a retreat for themselves to discuss writing? They end up trying their hand at fiction. CHANDANA BANERJEE describes this unusual experiment.

Every day and every minute of our professional lives is spent obsessing over the written word. Does this article read well; will the story enthrall readers; could I have come up with a better idea; how do I add more chutzpah to the copy? – Questions that all writers ask themselves a zillion times in the length and breadth of their writing careers.

As journalists, writers and editors, we're constantly honing our craft and always trying to come up with a good story, crisp copy, and a flash of dazzling creativity. But somewhere between chasing deadlines and bagging bylines; between juggling home and office, work and family, the general business of living and earning begins to deplete the pool of creativity that each of us has. That's when we need to getaway from it all and lavish some time on our muse; spend some time nurturing our passion for the written word.

A group of six freelance journalists and writers did just that in the beginning of this month. Armed with notebooks and pens, they set out for a writer's retreat at Yercaud, a picturesque and serene hill station 40 kilometers from Salem, Tamil Nadu.

"Take time to retreat; only then you can leap ahead," states Radhika Meganathan, the brain behind this writer's retreat. Radhika, the Managing Editor of Chandamama.com and a freelance journalist and author from Chennai, says that its wanderlust and the talent for planning that made her coordinate this writer's retreat. Having organized a weekend retreat a year ago, Radhika wanted to plan a longer one that would focus on writing.

A day of Detox

2008-05-23T05:24:00.003-04:00

Here's how to spent a day in detox:

Items needed:
Seasonal fruits - 1/2 kilo each
Juicer or a sharp knife (to make fruit salad)
Good books or movies
Walking shoes
Self-discipline

Schedule
6am – 4 glasses of water; drink in 5-minute intervals
9am - a glass of mosambi/water melon/limejuice+honey
10am – a glass of hot water with jeera
11pm – again, a glass of mosambi/water melon/limejuice+honey
12:30pm - 1 big bowl of fruit salad
1:00am - Be prepared for a marathon headache or craving for fried items
1:30pm - 1 glass of mosambi juice
3:30pm - 1 glass of orange juice
4:30pm - Murderous rage; inclination to kill anybody who's eating a samosa
5:00pm - One bowl of water melon + banana + guava chunks
6:00pm - An urge to howl or sob. You want to bite into a chicken leg - fried or raw, it won't matter now. For the love of Jalebis, RESIST!
7:30pm - 1 bowl of orange + mango + Nungu chunks
8:30pm - An amazing feeling of freshness and rigour
9:00pm - 1 bowl of Noi Kanchi (rice porridge)
10:00pm - Go to bed with a great smile. You have done it!

TIPS:
So what to do between drinking juices and slowly going mad?
In the morning, read a book (I finished "The Accidental Tourist").
In the afternoon, see a movie (I saw "Absence of Malice"). Alternately, you can also spend some time in the spa or a salon, pampering yourself.
In the evening, go for a walk. You can also work on a hobby, explore the Internet, catch up on old email or update your blog.

LIKE A GODDESS

2008-05-14T22:56:00.003-04:00

Back when I was doing my college, the worst thing you could be in India is… slim.

I was reed-thin and clothes hung on my frame delicately. People were always concerned about my health (“Are you sure you aren’t anemic?”). Relatives scolded my mother for not feeding me properly. I still remember a cousin’s mocking query. “Why is your body like a cylinder?”

And of course, men always like an hourglass figure, right?

Thus began my quest to put ““more meat on my bones”. I went on a gastronomic rampage. I started my mornings with roasted pancakes and huge dollops of cow’s butter. Afternoon saw me attacking chicken biriyani and meat patties. In the evening, I devoured deep-fried onion pakoras and I usually went to sleep after a heavy dinner of chapattis and cheese buttermasala.

My skin and body told me that it felt ill to consume such food everyday. I didn’t bother to listen. My sole aim was to turn into a lush Indian goddess and my body better be under my command.

My body eventually started to change. My face got round and the cheeks fleshed out. My stomach dropped and my clothes didn’t fit me anymore. I started to slouch and began to walk slower than ever. One fine day, I stopped by the mirror.

Oh no! This was no goddess staring back. True, I was not a cylinder any more. But I was not an hourglass either. I had become neither sensual nor sexy. I was in fact, looking like an inverted cone with sick, bloated features.

READ MORE

Hotel Grand China Pincess, Bangkok

2007-12-25T01:11:00.000-05:00

My family and I stayed in this hotel for 4 nights in the 3rd week of December 2007.

When we checked in, they showed us a tiny suite for 4... my dad felt suffocated on entering the suite and when I called the reception, they immediately arranged for us to be shifted to a palatial suite... at no extra cost. It was so speedy and done with so much courtesy that I was really astounded and happy.

The service, throughout our stay, was like this... prompt and polite, and no one lingered for a tip. Rooms were cleaned and made up everyday, it was spotless. Sure the corridors smell of smoke, but what do you expect from a smoking floor?

The revolving restaurant in the top had some amazing views and will be ideal if you have someone with you to impress. Yes, the food is overpriced, but the ambience makes up for it. The complimentary morning buffet (served from 6:00 to 10:00) is delicious and had over 30 dishes, even Indian pulao!

There are, however, three minor problems I had. The pool was open only after 9am... it was difficult to have a dip when we had a busy touring schedule ahead of us. Like most other hotels in Bangkok, we had problems with English-speaking staff... we had to speak real slow to make them understand what we were asking... and the internet cost 200 baht an hour! Really steep!

Apart from those few minus points, GCP is a gem of a place to stay in Chinatown. The staffs in the reception were always smiling, and the concierge and the porters were very willing to help us, and guide us. I'd definitely return!

Thailand trip 2007

2007-12-22T00:30:00.000-05:00

My article in LITTLE INDIA

2007-12-12T21:45:00.002-05:00

THE RETURN
By Radhika Meganathan

The ancient gray and blue carpet covered the entire floor of the Indian air carrier we boarded in New York. Most of the passengers are harried couples with children, searching woodenly for their seats. One wailing baby crawls on the floor and wets himself. The stain spreads slowly on the carpet.

Impatient nudges prompt me to find and slump on my seat. The plane starts to vibrate, while I continue staring at the stain on the carpet. I could have flown Singapore Airlines, but picked this one because it was cheaper. After all, I will not be paid in dollars in India.

I still am not able to believe it. I have spent my whole life dreaming about living in America. And now, after I made the impossible leap, I am leaving. In fact, I have left... we are now in mid-air.

A sigh escapes me. I first came to the United States in 2004 on an international fellowship. It had hit me in the arrival lounge at Newark International Airport - introverted middle-class Indian women do not get all-expense paid trips and fellowships. But here I was, in the land of my dreams.

I was in the US only for a month at the time. But it changed me forever. No pressures. No guilt. No judgment. And so much beauty. Such delights motivated me to return the following year on an internship, working for the same magazine that had awarded me the fellowship.

Lost in thought, I am brought back to reality by a slight touch on my forearm. When I notice my next-seat companion, I groan silently. Trust the fates to seat me beside a leering Indian businessman. This one looks slightly older than my father.

"Hi, I own a motel in Kansas," he says, licking his lips. "Ever been in a motel?"

27... and miles to go...

2007-04-28T13:34:00.000-04:00

I was born 27 years ago today.

My childhood pal's grandma, living in the house opposite to mine, died today :(.

Birth and death. Like two sides of a coin.

It's a li'l scary. Not the aging part. I mean the "What have you done so far worthwhile in your life" part.

The grandma lived to a ripe old age and every one paid her their respects today. She was well-loved by all.

What have I done in my life - so far - to warrant such a respect, if I were to - god forbid - die today?

Let's see, in the past 27 years I managed to -

1. Get admitted in one of the best colleges in India, flunk repeatedly and finally manage to pass out of architecture college

2. Find out that I can write. I CAN WRITE! I AM NOT WORTHLESS!

3. Get infatuated in and out of then-divine and now-blah dudes (both on-screen and real life). Learn that all that's white is not fevicol (lol)

4. Win a writers' fellowship from a US magazine and visit the great country... come back to motherland, write a series of eight picture books and start tasting success as a writer

5. Become closer to parents in one year and persuade them to let go of me

6. Go back to US again as a trainee in the same magazine that gave me the fellowship

7. Manage to find one true love - New York. Fall utterly and madly in love with the place. Wish to be buried there.

8. Like all true love stories, break up with New York (visa expiration) and return to motherland. Get commissioned to write 40 picture books on Mahabharatha and complete it exactly a year later (avg. = one book in 10 days)

9. Become a freelance columnist for some cool glossies in South India and snag a job as a Copy Lead in Officetiger

10. Been a good friend and confidante to some great friends like Sudha who remember my birthday and send me gift certificate when I least expected it (talk about pleasant shocks!)

So. I guess I have not done bad. But still... there are so many things I want to do. I want to take workshops for writers. I want to start a career counselling center for students. I want to visit a country a year. I want to go to New York and listen to that Tibetan music at Times Square. I want to start my own magazine soon.

Miles to go. And the average goal rate ain't so good.

But I'll try. That's all we can do, right?

WELL, Back I am

2006-05-25T10:25:00.001-04:00

Less than 10 months ago, I came to US, possibly looking to make a life here. I did have a great time. The experience and insight I had gathered, the lessons and new things I had learned, the friendship and memories I had made... It was wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world!

Yet I am back in India.

The reasons are many. I couldn't bear the cold, I was tired of getting sick all the time, I was lonely, I wanted to have Indian food three times a day, I missed my cat, I missed writing, I din't want to exist as one among the million NRIs in the US...

Somehow, the wish to be a NRI got replaced by a wish to be SOMEONE.

So many reasons... and the main one - I realised that the children's publishing industry is saturated in the US, and I would have to start from scratch... whereas, in India I can be a pioneer in the field... and I got a huge opportunity to be that, to be a writing partner of a creative agency...

Not to mention that the week after I landed in India, I found out - painfully, of course - that I had kidney stones. I shudder to think of the expense and the agony I'd have faced and the nuisance I'd have caused if it had happened when I was in US...

God works in mysterious ways, don't you think?

N for NYC

2005-09-11T04:17:00.002-04:00

The Big Apple is where I hang out these days.

Of course, I love my little pastoral town – with its rolling meadows and deep woods - but NY is something else – vibrant, maddening, pulsating. There’s simply no comparison at all, it’s like asking which do you like – chocolate mousse or chicken korma!

I made interesting discoveries while here –

-- You can see black (African-American), yellow (Chinee) and brown (Latin and Indian) faces here, more than white faces

-- The subway is not a dangerous place, unless you want to dance on the tracks. I always managed to get lost and always a kind stranger rescued me and put me on the right train

-- When you're in Times Square, you can always see a maami (a dowager aunt in India) in a sari, usually between the ages 40-80

-- Contrary to popular belief, the streets of America are not rife with smooching couples. I’m yet to see a couple kissing or hugging in public.

-- If you're lost, never, EVER ask directions to an African-American (esp. girls), a Mexican or a Indian. Because... the first one will deliberately show you the opposite direction, the second will spend 5 minutes telling you that he doesn't know and the third one will ask your entire biography before he helps you out with the right address.

That's it for now :)

My Top 20 in life...

2005-09-03T17:16:00.000-04:00

... that’s guaranteed to bring a smile in your face!

20. An almost-empty bus (or one that arrives at the bus stop as soon as you do!)

19. Teasing the bride with the groom on the marriage hall

18. Finding a 100-rupee note - or a 20$ bill! - in your desk, just when you’re really, really broke

17. Watching a great movie with NO babies crying, NO fathead sitting before you and absolutely NO distractions whatsoever

16. Funny dreams that linger for a long time after you’ve woken up

15. A meal of crab soup, mutton biriyani and lichee ice cream with hot gulab jamun (yumm)

14. A nice, intelligent conversation with a guy who doesn't think he's God's gift to women

13. Walking uphill in Kodaikkanal roads in the early morning

12. Getting a surprise gift on your birthday (wow!)

11. Planning a surprise gift and giving it when it’s least expected (double wow!)

10. Laughing for a silly joke so hard your face hurts

9. Dressing up for a special occasion (or for a special person!)

8. Runner’s high, collapsing under the fan after a hard run

7. Brunch, movie, gossip and shopping with your best friend

6. Playing with a puppy and feeding it from your hand

5. Writing all night and reaching the wretched deadline just in time

4. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you

3. Reading a terrific book in bed, listening to the rain outside

2. Having a child snuggle close to you and tell a secret

1. Just being in the same room with someone you love :)

Finally found a place

2005-08-01T14:02:00.001-04:00

Can you believe this?!

I come to a proper american village in USA, 3 hours from the nearest city, where I expected to be the only dark-skinned person in town... and I learn that there's going to another!

Yep, another Indian + unmarried + woman - same as me - has joined the company!

Now that I have a room mate, I can finally afford to look for an apartment. My roomie, AB, is a very chic and friendly person who, I am relieved to say, is not at all snobbish or haughty (sadly, most of the Indian women I meet in the US are). She readily agreed to house-hunt with me, and we have okay'ed on a upper floor apt of a Victorian house in Brown Street.

The apt has 2 bedrooms, a big kitchen, a small-ish living room, and a full attic space (equivalent to the apt floor)... the flat is around 15 min walk to the office, but AB has a car, so I won't have much problem... the rent is US$500 per month, that comes to US$300 per head, incl. utilities...not bad at all, I'd say.
Thanks again, Marileta, for letting me crash your place for MORE THAN 2 MONTHS!

Once again, I am just stunned. A well-paying internship in the most developed country in the world, wonderful co-workers who can't do enough for me, and a friendly Indian roomie with a car... Am I being watched over an angel or what?

The Astrological Case Study of Yours Truly

2005-07-16T23:33:00.000-04:00

Shoot me, but I caved in and actually ordered a online paid report about my "astro" personality. It cost me a mere ten dollars, which is my sole justification... And I hate to tell this... most of the readings were surprisingly accurate – which just pisses me off.

Oh well. There’s a lot of unexplained things in the world, let this be one more in the line!

Here’s my birth chart dissected for both entertainment and scientific purposes –

Ascedant: Libra
Sun: Taurus
Moon: Libra
Mercury: Aries
Venus: Gemini
Mars: Leo
Jupiter: Virgo
Saturn: Virgo

*

Ascendant is the face you show to the world; how others see you
ASCENDANT IN LIBRA

- A great healer and counselor
tell me about it, sigh.

- Struggles to find balance in own life
don’t know about that. When I make up my mind, I usually stick to it.

- Aesthetically inclined; loves beauty
I guess, yeah.

*

Sun rules your outer personality
SUN IN TAURUS

- Stubborn
yep

- Sensual
er, I guess

- Slow to anger; extremely dangerous when angered
Hmm, could be. Just ask my parents, grin.

- Very oriented toward the material world
Really? I wouldn’t know, since I am always broke.

- Practical, stodgy and resists changes
WRONG! I love love LOVE changes, my favorite pastime is building castles in the air and I hate stodginess in any form.

*

Moon rules emotional part of your character
MOON IN LIBRA
- Born peacemaker; will do anything to maintain peace
- Will go to pieces during a dispute
- Wants to be loved by everyone

Yes. Yes. Dammit, YES!

*

Mercury is responsible for your style of Communication
MERCURY IN ARIES
- Impulsive and hot-headed.
- Over the top enthusiast
- Speaks without thinking

I totally agree to all the above, grrrr.

*

Venus is how you attract - the planet of Love
VENUS IN GEMINI

- Love of words; loves to travel
YES!

- Multiple affairs of the heart; loves to love two at a time
What? WHAT?

- Flirty, flighty and promiscuous
What the FUCK, grrrrrr….

- More than one profession indicated
okay, phew. That’s true enough.

- Loves freedom and is independent to the core
er, true too.

*

Mars is how you go after things - the planet of Action
MARS IN LEO
- Daring and courageous; doesn’t accept defeat easily
Exactly. Heh heh.

- Will woo in grand style
oh yeah, baby….

- Can be bossy and arrogant
Mayyyyy be….

- Loves to show off
Huh? Who, me? No way!

- The sign Mars occupies in a woman’s natal chart implies the kind of men she will be attracted to. Your Mars is in Leo so, given a chance, you’ll be all over the Leo cats
This is so, SO creepily true I’m not even going to talk about it, grrrr.

(Apparently, the sign Venus in a man’s birth chart will imply the kind of women he falls for!)

*

Jupiter is the planet of career
JUPITER IN VIRGO

- Blessed with perfection for detail
huh? Dude, that is so NOT true!

- Works best in a group
yeah, but I also work well by myself.

- Destined for practical service in a worthwhile cause
Absolutely. One day I dream of working for the UN. (Yes, really.)

*

Saturn rules the principle of limitation.
SATURN IN VIRGO

- When Saturn is in a sun sign, it tampers with the exact qualities that sign are known for. Virgo is the sign renown for great attention and fanatic detailing. When Saturn is in Virgo, slackness and aimlessness is a result.
Oh. So that’s why I’m such a OB?

- Must learn discipline and avoid distractions.
Hmm. Whatever.

- The person has difficulty distinguishing what is important from what is not. Therefore the native must work extra hard to clarify ill defined circumstances and chaotic situations. At times this may seem overwhelming. As a result, there can be mental worry, hypochondria, and depression.
Noted. Will try to worry less from now on – by OBing more, heh heh.

-
-
-

Finally, here are the five most important things that, according to this report, have defined my current personality –

Sun in Taurus, Moon in Libra
"The combination of your Sun sign and your Moon sign produces one of the most likable personalities in the Zodiac wheel. Others may have more wit, ambition, or intellect, but none equal the charm and appeal of this combination. This personality is marked with optimism, even if up to your ears in private woes. Anyone that doesn't like you is probably motivated by jealousy."

A nice home and a close family are your first loves; social contact and involvement, a close second. You may have a wide range of emotional responses from rapturous joy when you are happily with a special someone in a solid relationship, to almost going to pieces when you are confronted by hostility and forced to react to it. But your great sense of balance and harmony constantly protects you from ever go off the deep end.

Heh heh. Thanks for the compliments!

Sun in Taurus, Venus in Gemini
“In Gemini, Venus generates a need for a variety of experiences. You want to taste all that life has to offer. You have an excitable child-like attitude toward romance, approaching affairs of the heart with light-headed optimism and high-expectations. Change and excitement is the spice of your love life, and a partner that doesn't understand this won't be around long.

With Venus in Gemini, you are easily bored and if you marry too young or to someone who is possessive, you may have serious problems. Luckily, your sun is in the most emotionally stable sign of Taurus. This is mutually beneficial, since Taurus will temper the flightiness of the Gemini Venus and in turn, your Venus will lighten up the stodgy nature of your Taurus sun sign.”

Phew, sigh. For a minute I thought I was a goner.

Sun in Taurus, Mars in Leo
“The persevering stability of Taurus and the enthusiastic optimism of Leo join hands to create one of the most success-driven planetary positions in a birth chart. With the Sun in Taurus and Mars in Leo, you are one determined and volatile person who will never stop at obstacles but will just keep going and going till you reach your goal. This combination is usually found in the birth chart of leaders, pioneers and unfortunately, dictators. Make sure you don’t invite bossiness, bullheadedness and over-confidence in your nature.”

Oh, stop it! Enough with the praises, don't make me blush!

Influence of Venus and Mars
Since Venus is very strong in your chart, your Gemini traits will tend to dominate your decisions and all your life, you must battle between the flighty Venus side and the sensible Taurus side of your psyche.

Sigh. That's true enough, I guess.

Your frivolous and flighty exterior hides an ambitious nature. You would probably end up with a man who is an aggressive but fickle charmer and moves in influential circles. You would then become his muse and in time the devoted mother of his children.

Huh?

Influence of Sun and Moon
You have your sun in Taurus, moon in Libra and ascendant in Libra. Venus is the Planet of Love that rules both Taurus and Libra. As a Venus native, you just can’t help being in love. Your sun, moon and ascendant are all under the control of Venus, which means that your whole world revolves around the word LOVE.

Drat.

Without something or somebody to love, your life will feel incomplete. You wouldn't know how to live alone, because you cannot live without somebody to love in your life. With the triple influence of Venus in your birth chart, you understand what a man's wants, and know exactly how to give it to him!

Alright, that’s it, now SHUT UP!

I'm a WHAT?

2005-07-02T16:18:00.000-04:00

People always wonder why I chose to do an internship when I am already a published author. Back in India I’ve given writing workshops, sat on editorial meetings with publishers and single-handedly edited book length manuscripts, BUT… I have never known where the bottom rung of the ladder was.

You see, I’ve never been an intern, an editorial assistant, a junior editor… which is how I should have progressed. I got directly appointed as the in-staff manuscript writer and editor, just because I happened to be at the right place, at the right time with the right credentials. It’s probably my good karma, but still, it had always made me uneasy. Very uneasy.

I probably sound stupid, but I feel the best way to the top is by climbing from the bottom … any other way you don’t know when its all gonna vanish. Poof!

That’s why I applied for the trainee position at this magazine, 'cos –

- one, they are teaching me the basics, which I had always missed knowing about;

- two, I’m going to live in the US (yay!)

- and three, frankly, I’d have even accepted a job in Mars to get away from my match-making mother!

....And yeah, there's a very important fourth reason which shall remain in deadly secrecy for all eternity (till I publish it online someday when its safe to do so :)

All considered, I think it’s a pretty good bargain!

You're a WHAT?

2005-07-01T18:29:00.001-04:00

That's what people say when I tell them that I'm an architect.

Yeah, yeah. I AM a qualified architect. Honest to God, I am. But I’m now write children’s books. Go figure.

As the saying goes, the whole thing was an accident. Only in my case, it was a horrifying, mind-numbing, and soul-bending accident.

Okay I am only half-kidding. It wasn’t that terrible… but, yeah, it was a nightmare.

I wanted to be a journalist and join Discovery Channel. Ok, may be that sounds really childish, but when you’re 17 and love animals, you could see that it had a certain appeal. But ah, reality.

My parents were appalled at my “ambition”. Like any other sensible folks, they wanted me to be a computer engineer.

So I chose to study architecture - an utterly-immature, twisted choice that said “If you’re not approving my dream, I’m not going to approve yours either”.

Boy, did that prove to be the ugliest decision in my life…

As far as I can remember, college was a series of frustrated idleness, sudden bursts of rewarding creativity and long, mind-numbing periods of OBing. With no talent as an artist and minimal social skills, I was fated to be a failure. I bunked, flunked, slept through the lectures, the exams and the whole damn years – in short, I totally, totally wasted an expensive, good education, grrrr….

May be I could have survived if I didn’t have to compete with some of the best brains in the state… but that was not to be the case. I think some of the lecturers in my college are still heaving in relief that I finally left the college…

Welll… I guess I couldn’t say that it was not all a total waste… during my training period, I made the discovery that I liked to write, which paved the way to my current profession… and I had formed some surprise friendships that have lasted till this moment…

Probably the only regret I have about the whole thing - the waste of a perfectly good and rare college seat in one of the top universities in India. If some really deserving person had got admission instead of me, s/he would have been much, much happier…

As such, it’s always fun to watch people’s eyes pop out when I say that I don't practise architecture, even though I did graduate. I always get lectured during family get-togethers and functions that why, oh why, do I have to waste an architecture degree for - huh, gasp, eek! – writing stories… and why can I practice design during the day and write during the night?

Yeah, right, and I’m a friggin’ Super Woman, grrrr.

Biggest Apple in the World

2005-06-27T05:05:00.002-04:00

I was in the city last week. I mean, I was in THE city. The Big Apple.

I was all prepared to hate it. I mean, I did hate it when I was there before. Last year, I had a harried tourist's view of it - and I hate to have a harried view of anything. I enjoy discovering new things everytime I go to the Walmart in my town, so naturally, I didn't like finding myself rushed from one place to another in New York.

My hosts were very sweet, I should say - school pal Vidya and her hubby Aravind transported me from Boston to NY in their own car and took me around, touring the major attractions in the weekend. But still, I was disconcerted, cheated as if I had been served a badly cooked meal. So I went back to India feeling disillusioned.

But this time, it was different. I had time. I had a week in fact. And I was alone. Yayyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!

I stayed as a house-guest at 72nd Street. My writer-pal Shelley had very kindly invited me to share her gorgeous Manhattan Apartment and it was a week I'd never forget in my life. It's really surprising how different, how utterly refreshing things are when you are prepared to look at them in leisure.

Central Park didn't feature in our schedule last time. I spent every afternoon there last month.

Times Square left me cold last year. This year, I could barely stand still - the very air smelled thrilling.

And SAJA 2005 in Columbia University was pure manna. I finally felt like I belonged somewhere.

New York is like slow poison. By the time it was sunday, the day I had to leave, I felt sick - physically sick. But like all good things in the world, I knew I had to go - and I knew I always could come back.

Would come back.

First drafts

2005-06-24T23:07:00.000-04:00

At first glance, I admit, I do look like your basic brittle and screwed-up NRI woman you see scattered in the metros of the US. But I don't live in the city (ah, NY!). I don't even live in the suburbs. I'm not on H1B, I'm not in debt and I'm not even safely married to a silicon-valley resident.

What I am is on the wrong side of 25, right side of a writing career and the greatest procrastinator in the world.

I live in a beautiful little town in Pennsylvania. It has exactly 3 streets, one little park and about a million lush, green woods. I'm here for an year-long training in the editorial offices of a children's magazine and each day I wake up, not entirely believing that I'm here, in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.

I'm writing this blog solely to keep tab on my progress in the next 12 months - which I'm hoping I would. Like any great procrastinator, I have a very poor memory - or rather the great ability to block out certain memories... if allowed, I'll happily spend my remaining time in blissful rut and never learn a thing outside my training.

And along the way, my O.B.l.o.g will also try to - if I actually write something - tabulate the woeful struggles faced by yours truly in trying to finish the great Indian novel.

Alright, put on your seat belt. And stay tuned. Yawn.

Today was my first day at work.

2005-06-23T17:45:00.000-04:00

I am the new editorial intern at Highlights for Children, world's most-circulated children's magazine @ two million subscribers. My workplace is located in a beautiful place called Honesdale, in Pennsylvania. I have been here before - it was last year, when I won the fellowship and stayed here for a couple of days - and I am falling in love with the place again.

It was a little strange in the beginning, but I quickly understood about the duties... mostly administrative work, but also attending meetings with editors and doing research work for them.

I love my desk... and my own computer. Andy and George are in the same room as I, and Joelle and Judy in the next room. Everyone is being so helpful and kind... I think I have been blessed by God to have such nice people as my colleagues!

So here I am... in the US Of A!

2005-06-10T22:30:00.000-04:00

I am inssssssssssssanely excited... to put it mildly. when I landed, I felt like kissing the floor of the airport. I swear, even the AIR here feels different.... oh wait, I know what it is... it smells of freeso, new opportunities and new horizons!

I am, of course, a little scared of the internship... will I pass muster? I do feel a tad overqualified for the gig... but I'm here for the experience, so I am happy!

Will I go back? As of now, I really don't know. I have a full year to make that decision.